Search found 139 matches

by Indianapolis
Wed Jun 09, 2021 10:26 am
Forum: Our Friends and Families
Topic: I read my partners 4th Step
Replies: 15
Views: 3205

Re: I read my partners 4th Step

It appears that someone revived a 2 year old dead thread, the OP is likely long gone, FYI. And there is no value to the next person who comes along seeking answers.... Applying your logic, a thread should be locked after a certain amount of inactivity, or was that meant to be a personal shot? Still...
by Indianapolis
Wed Jun 09, 2021 5:26 am
Forum: Our Friends and Families
Topic: I read my partners 4th Step
Replies: 15
Views: 3205

Re: I read my partners 4th Step

It appears that someone revived a 2 year old dead thread, the OP is likely long gone, FYI.
by Indianapolis
Mon Jun 07, 2021 6:54 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: AA cliches
Replies: 53
Views: 697

Re: AA cliches

It's funny, though -- I still say it. I say it regularly to sponsees and newcomers. Since we're the minority, we've gotta remember that it DOES resonate for a lot of people. Don't forget to say it if it'll help someone else, even if it makes you cringe.
by Indianapolis
Mon Jun 07, 2021 6:49 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Pie Charts - Balance
Replies: 3
Views: 82

Pie Charts - Balance

In another thread, someone mentioned work/recovery life balance. It made me think of a cool speech I'd heard once, and I can't find the video to share unfortunately. It was by a Dr. Timothy Kelly, an Indianapolis recovery leader. Dr. Kelly used pie charts to describe time and effort. Maybe we all ha...
by Indianapolis
Mon Jun 07, 2021 6:43 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: AA cliches
Replies: 53
Views: 697

Re: AA cliches

I cringe at that one too. And I know that makes me the minority view, but I do. When I finally truly came into the program, I'd realized that drinking was never going to be a plausible life choice for me, ever again. I relied on that longer view, so ODAT always feel "white-knucklish." That...
by Indianapolis
Mon Jun 07, 2021 6:38 am
Forum: Sponsorship
Topic: Should I find a new sponsor?
Replies: 9
Views: 184

Re: Should I find a new sponsor?

So, a few thoughts. First, it's 100% reasonable to change sponsors. I haven't had to do that, I've been lucky with my sponsor. But, there's no rule that says you cannot change if the connection is not right. What matters is trust, honesty, and experience. Second, 6 mo seems like a LONG time to go wi...
by Indianapolis
Thu May 20, 2021 9:32 am
Forum: If It Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else
Topic: Why is cigarette smoking so widely accepted by AA members
Replies: 46
Views: 1030

Re: Why is cigarette smoking so widely accepted by AA members

Actually I have one more thought here. Nicotine has helped keep me from relapsing on alcohol. How? Because every time I try to control my nicotine addiction, I remember how powerful the addict brain is. I don't smoke for a few days, feel good. Decide that I can definitely have a cigar. The next day ...
by Indianapolis
Thu May 20, 2021 6:17 am
Forum: If It Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else
Topic: Why is cigarette smoking so widely accepted by AA members
Replies: 46
Views: 1030

Re: Why is cigarette smoking so widely accepted by AA members

I wouldn't have gone to detox if they wouldn't have allowed smoking. No way was I going to do both at the same time. When I came out of rehab, my sponsor suggested that I should consider quitting SOMEDAY. Not immediately. I'm now about 2 years sober. I've tried quitting smoking several times, and am...
by Indianapolis
Tue May 11, 2021 11:47 am
Forum: The 12 Steps
Topic: Amends and infidelity
Replies: 10
Views: 722

Re: Amends and infidelity

It's a challenging thing whenever an Al-Anon'er wants advice on alcoholism from a bunch of alcoholics. I don't have great al-anon advice. But, I'll say that my wife also had some "expectations" about when and how she'd get amends from me. She was disappointed. My sponsor suggested that som...
by Indianapolis
Thu Apr 29, 2021 8:29 am
Forum: If It Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else
Topic: Smoking Weed
Replies: 14
Views: 8983

Re: Smoking Weed

I tried to quit drinking by just smoking weed. It did not work for me. I have to say if it want for cigarettes and coffee, I don’t think I would of gotten sober. Last I looked, they are considered drugs. So,......I’m in the whatever works for you camp. I tried that too. Turns out my addictive brain...
by Indianapolis
Wed Apr 14, 2021 11:49 am
Forum: Sponsorship
Topic: "Locker room talk"
Replies: 10
Views: 548

Re: "Locker room talk"

Ah yeah, I hear that. I haven't had to change sponsors, but if I did I'd be trying to find the new sponsor first, start to build that relationship, and then just let my existing sponsor know that I've been talking more recently with "Bob" or whatever and that I've decided to make him my sp...
by Indianapolis
Wed Apr 14, 2021 10:27 am
Forum: Sponsorship
Topic: "Locker room talk"
Replies: 10
Views: 548

Re: "Locker room talk"

Consider finding a new sponsor. There's no obligation that you stick with a single sponsor, it's completely ok to change sponsors. It's critical that you be totally "open and honest" with your sponsor. So, if you're not connecting with your sponsor for any reason, it's better that you find...
by Indianapolis
Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:29 pm
Forum: Young People in AA (YPAA)
Topic: My story
Replies: 11
Views: 776

Re: My story

I've had time to sit and think through things and you're right, I may be putting some of the blame off of myself in an attempt to just connect all the dots that led me to where I'm at, but I don't think anybody but myself could have gotten me to where I am and have been. I hear you, man, about blam...
by Indianapolis
Thu Apr 08, 2021 11:50 am
Forum: Young People in AA (YPAA)
Topic: My story
Replies: 11
Views: 776

Re: My story

Good detailed story. It fully describes the progressive nature of the disease.

So what's your recovery strategy/approach? How are you finding life changing for you?
by Indianapolis
Mon Mar 01, 2021 8:34 am
Forum: The Home Group
Topic: By laws for an AA group
Replies: 10
Views: 661

Re: By laws for an AA group

I retract my prior message! Don't know if I've read/studied that longer form, but you're right. Interesting.