Search found 550 matches

by tomsteve
Fri Jul 16, 2021 2:30 am
Forum: If It Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else
Topic: Sober Student Here - Want to help with my research?
Replies: 6
Views: 2005

Re: Sober Student Here - Want to help with my research?

Mainly I’m looking to better understand which habits and things that you feel have played the biggest role in your sobriety, or things that you tried that didn’t work, and why. what played the biggest role in m sobriety: first and foremost-God the gift of desperation. the pain of getting drunk had ...
by tomsteve
Thu Jul 15, 2021 4:41 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Round 3 Day 2 For Me...
Replies: 8
Views: 257

Re: Round 3 Day 2 For Me...

I will seek out a meeting, I've known of my local meeting location for years, just haven't had the courage to show. Working on that. courage- that brings back memories. i needed courage to help me walk through the doors of my first AA meeting- when i wanted help. why did i need courage? i had a hug...
by tomsteve
Thu Jul 01, 2021 12:50 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Freedom from Fear
Replies: 22
Views: 682

Re: Freedom from Fear

Anyway, my HP gave me a gift today, starting my new lawnmower untouched by anybody else besides me. Being married is nice, but have you ever loaded a giant box weighing over 100 pounds into your car, got it out and fixed a high end lawnmower yourself? 😁956B8FA7-3EF0-49D2-B0F3-1E14B2B69877.jpeg exce...
by tomsteve
Sun Jun 20, 2021 4:50 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Freedom from Fear
Replies: 22
Views: 682

Re: Freedom from Fear

i didnt know how much fear i was living in until i got sober and on the 5th step. one of my favorite daily reflections: All these failings generate fear, a soul-sickness in its own right. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 49 "Fear knocked at the door; faith answered; no one was there."...
by tomsteve
Sat Jun 19, 2021 5:16 am
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: Counting the days/months/years
Replies: 34
Views: 18094

Re: Counting the days/months/years

I may have said this before... but early on I heard that the newcomer does not understand or care about 30 years of sobriety. early on, i was somewhat intimidated when id hear them big numbers. well, intimidated AND a bit arrogant- someone with 30+ years sober CANT have any idea of what im facing t...
by tomsteve
Mon Jun 07, 2021 1:42 pm
Forum: Sponsorship
Topic: Should I find a new sponsor?
Replies: 9
Views: 629

Re: Should I find a new sponsor?

His response was basically I don’t care, AA comes first. absolutely NOT. lets look at what the BB says- a part that is overlooked by many: None of us makes a sole vocation of this work, nor do we think its effectiveness would be increased if we did. We feel that elimination of our drinking is but a...
by tomsteve
Thu Jun 03, 2021 7:01 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Thyroid Cancer
Replies: 4
Views: 262

Re: Thyroid Cancer

Has anyone here ever had cancer? I was recently diagnosed with thyroid cancer and I'm struggling a bit to stay fit for the time being. Does anyone have a method to make the situation better? Thanks! i was diagnosed stage 3c melanoma 13 months into recovery. 5 year survival rate at the time was 23% ...
by tomsteve
Sun May 30, 2021 8:26 am
Forum: The Home Group
Topic: Kids in meetings
Replies: 54
Views: 25859

Re: Kids in meetings

I remember a meeting years ago where one woman always brought her two young children and would sit up front near the leader where the kids always disturbed the meeting instead of going to the back of the meeting were the same noise would have been less disturbing and she would have been less selfis...
by tomsteve
Mon May 24, 2021 2:39 am
Forum: If It Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else
Topic: Why is cigarette smoking so widely accepted by AA members
Replies: 47
Views: 2040

Re: Why is cigarette smoking so widely accepted by AA members

My main question revolves around the lack of disapproval to this "outside" issue, addictive drug, as opposed to the, in general, unanimous disapproval to other "outside" issue addictive drugs. the difference between cigarrettes and other outside drugs is quite simple: how many p...
by tomsteve
Sun Jan 03, 2021 9:59 am
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: Need to begin
Replies: 6
Views: 1006

Re: Need to begin

I need to begin again. I cannot stay sober for the long haul. I can't even decide how to begin again. I feel terrible about myself. And as of right now, my life is good. I'm a problem drinker and can't control it once I start. Aside from my drinking my life is good. It's my secret I hide. I don't w...
by tomsteve
Wed Dec 30, 2020 4:03 am
Forum: The Family Afterwards
Topic: Recovering with family
Replies: 12
Views: 4265

Re: Recovering with family

Hi Suzie, My sponsor says "if you want someone to trust you you have to start by doing what they tell you to do." that reads more like: wanna control freak to control ya? do what they tell you to do. =biggrin people started trusting me when i started doing the right thing because i wanted...
by tomsteve
Tue Dec 29, 2020 1:11 pm
Forum: The Family Afterwards
Topic: Recovering with family
Replies: 12
Views: 4265

Re: Recovering with family

Suzieintexas wrote: Mon Dec 28, 2020 12:34 am The dynamics of family are exhausting to me. What do I do??
glad ya made it back.
what i suggest is making sobriety #1 priority.
the dynamics of your family- even though they are family
not you circus not your monkeys.
stay in your own hoola hoop and toss out anything that causes it to wobble.
by tomsteve
Sun Dec 27, 2020 2:13 pm
Forum: A.A. Birthdays!
Topic: 40 years
Replies: 15
Views: 9027

Re: 40 years

Db1105 wrote: Fri Dec 25, 2020 10:58 am Still here in this crazy year to celebrate 43 years!
awesome!!
43 years ago i hadnt even had my first drink yet.
by tomsteve
Sat Dec 19, 2020 11:35 am
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: Cucumbers and Pickles
Replies: 8
Views: 957

Re: Cucumbers and Pickles

What I really don’t like, is when some folks put too much of an accent on the lines about a ‘daily reprieve,’ which comes after that, we have had good and sometimes heated discussions about that here. I would not wish to stay in AA if I felt that unless I did as suggested every day, I would relapse...
by tomsteve
Tue Dec 15, 2020 11:08 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: How to put together my story for a speaker meeting
Replies: 12
Views: 1356

Re: How to put together my story for a speaker meeting

I found for myself early on not to write anything down. Just went up there and shared my experience, strength and hope. Wherever it took me, that’s where it went. I’m not up there to entertain or tell a great story. I’m sharing when I am at during that moment in time. My only prep is to say the Ser...