Hello all,
This is my first time posting here. My name is Alex and I am an alcoholic. I am 30 years old, I have 2 kids, one 13 and the other 6. I am married to a very supportive wife who has stuck with me through all my S*** and I do not know why she did. I am a U.S. Army combat Veteran, I have a DUI and I would not say that was the point that turned my life backward...
The day way February, 28th, 2013. I admitted that I needed help. Back then I was drinking at least a 5th of vodka per day. I knew I had an issue and wanted help! I finally got the help I needed in the ICU at a local hospital, I was admitted for 3 weeks in the ICU because of DT's and how my body reacted to the absence of alcohol. After which, I was active in an aftercare program which took place 3 times a week for 2 hours a day and I attended AA meetings as often as I could.
I felt so strong at that point in my life. My kids were little, my addiction (to them) was new, and I stayed sober 100% for just over 2 years. It's the honeymoon phase, right?
Today is January 12, 2018, and I have relapsed 4 times since the time I originally quit.
Since my original admission to the hospital in 2013, I have willing taken myself to the emergency room two other times and admitted defeat by alcohol. Because of this, I have missed my children's birthdays, Christmas and anniversaries!
I have been lucky enough to find a great job. The problem with this job is that aside from everything that happens during the week, we have a meeting every Friday at 430 and everyone drinks beer. I have never drank at these meetings, but I always leave it on my mind, and I would be lying if I said I never drank after work on Fridays.
I do not like going to AA meetings in my area because often times it just makes me want to drink afterward..
I do want to be sober, I hate who I am when drinking. I hate how my wife hates who I aM when I am drinking... My kids are getting too old to see their dad drunk... I just need a good support group to hold me accountable.
So I am sorry if this post is out of line or not in the right place... There is so much more between the lines here... Just direct me where to go and I will be a daily poster!
Thank you,
Alex,
Alcoholic.