July 4th any staying sober

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July 4th any staying sober

Postby sammynorm » Sun Jul 02, 2017 7:02 pm

Hi,

I am coming up on 6 years sober (if I make it until July 11th). Six years ago on July 10th I got a 2nd DUI, and that incident got me to stop drinking.
There are some problems at my job, I may lose my job and/or have to change careers. Also, I think this is just a bad time of year for me. My first DUI was in June (summer as well).
I don't feel like drinking, but feel just really funky and anxious and unstable. I tend to feel this way around Christmas/New Years as well.

My plan is to lean heavier on the program for a while, thus my post here.

Kind of just wondering if others feel this way around this time of year, and if other people with some years of sobriety go through these phases as well.

-Amy
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Re: July 4th any staying sober

Postby avaneesh912 » Mon Jul 03, 2017 5:54 am

I drank almost everyday, of course holiday was an excuse to drink more, so when I finally realized that I have to change, I went for group therapy that led to a shrink. Who at that time didn't tell he was a member of AA, he suggested that I go to AA meeting. After arriving, after the initial struggle I was fortunate to run into some strong workshops on the internet. I had a deep realization that I am an alcoholic and that if I dont have a spiritual awakening/attitude shift, my mind would trick me into taking that insidious 1st drink and off to the races. So to get that spot I had to work the steps quickly and keep working at it.
So if you are not aware of the 10 step promises, would strongly suggest that you find a sponsor who would help you work toward that so you can experience the state of mind the book talks about as long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: July 4th any staying sober

Postby Brock » Mon Jul 03, 2017 6:44 am

My plan is to lean heavier on the program for a while, thus my post here.

Fair enough good plan, but of course assuming you have completed the steps, and therefore have something solid to lean on.

When I look at what people refer to as “working” the steps, it works if you work it and so on, I can only see a few steps they could possibly be referring to. In step 10 we find bits of all the other steps, we keep up with the program day by day, but it's not hard work we just get used to doing the right thing and it becomes a way of life, not really work, just automatic. Only in 11 it says we must continue to grow spiritually, and this is where I absolutely believe, and the literature says, our strength comes from. Only then do we have something solid enough to lean on, sometimes called a spiritual foundation. And a foundation is solid, a whole house can rest on it, hence the story of the person who built his house on sand and the other on rock, the rock is our spiritual strength.

There are so many you tube videos and speakers on spiritual ideas, free books on the internet, we have it easy in finding something which we will not find too boring, and still in the age when we have this technology, more and more people are turning away from spirituality. I don't for one second believe it has to be kneeling down and praying, some ladies in my home group find yoga to be a spiritual practice, some look for God in nature and He is there as well. Find the strength outlined in step 11, and anytime you feel down it can lift you up.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: July 4th any staying sober

Postby Spirit Flower » Mon Jul 03, 2017 7:44 am

My plan is to lean heavier on the program for a while, thus my post here.
Besides going to meetings, are you doing steps 10, 11, 12 morning and evening? Step 12 is more than helping others, it is practicing the principles in all our affairs. Read it in the 12x12 and you'll see tons of good information about how to conduct a sober life. Especially, it will help with work attitudes.
...a score card reading zero...
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Re: July 4th any staying sober

Postby PaigeB » Mon Jul 03, 2017 11:11 am

JULY 3

EXPERIENCE: THE BEST TEACHER

Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times.
— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 87

Some say that experience is the best teacher, but I believe that experience is the only teacher. I have been able to learn of God's love for me only by the experience of my dependence on that love. At first I could not be sure of His direction in my life, but now I see that if I am to be bold enough to ask for His guidance, I must act as if He has provided it. I frequently ask God to help me remember that He has a path for me.

From the book Daily Reflections
Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

When I first came in I did not have a Higher Power. Some say getting one is the whole purpose of the Steps. At any rate, just "who" was I supposed to ask when I did not believe anybody was there listening?

Well, I figured that somewhere in this world, at any given hour, Alcoholics were bowing their heads in prayer together. Whether they were opening or closing the meeting or just a one-on-one with their sponsor, I could be "with" them in Spirit. It got me through some tough times. It still does if I need Them.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
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Re: July 4th any staying sober

Postby ezdzit247 » Mon Jul 03, 2017 4:09 pm

sammynorm wrote:
Kind of just wondering if others feel this way around this time of year, and if other people with some years of sobriety go through these phases as well.

-Amy


Hi Amy

Congratulations on almost 6 years of sobriety!

Good topic.

Over the years I've heard many many AA members in meetings share that they get a little squirrelly around their sobriety birthdays, including myself. It will pass. I think it might be related to "fear of success" It sounds like that might be what you're experiencing with your birthday just a few days away. Doubling down on meetings, hanging out with your AA buddies and being good to you is the perfect antidote for this kind of squirrelly.
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Re: July 4th any staying sober

Postby desypete » Sat Jul 08, 2017 11:08 am

when i was in my 20s and first around aa the idea of birthdays or xmas times and even when my kids get married even though my kids were still babies lol played heavy on my mind as what could i do if i couldnt drink at those times ?

i was shy i didnt mix well i never fitted in anywhere really and although i was in aa at that time i was not part of aa i was just a memeber who shown up from time to time and would share depending who was in the room and who i was trying to impress
some of the old timers used to share after me and direct there share to me saying things like you have to walk the walk before you can talk the talk and i know today they could see right through me and my aa mask i would wear

but hindsight is a great thing but it doesnt help anyone when your stuck in that mindset

i can remember xmas times i was great on xmas day as the kids had there presents to open etc and it would be a real fun time
i felt cheated at xmas eve as i thought the whole world was out there getting hammered and having a great time and poor old me had to stay at home and not celebrate
i would get really angry at new years eve more so at my ex wife who would get the brunt of my anger as it was her fault i had to stop drinking and it was all unfair on me

anyway thankfully those days are well behind me as i accept who i am and what i am, i can go out and celebrate anything anywhere i wish to as i can drink coke or water and enjoy going home sober etc its no big deal but i had to do those things to find out it was all in my head that life is boreing and dull if you dont drink

aa in our area has mini conventions at xmas time with a disco dance in the night time
the dance floor is full the moment the music starts to play full of sober happy people having a dam good time

i can remember i would never get up and dance unless i was hammered as i would hate to look a fool lol today i am one of the first to get up and dance and enjoy making a pratt out of myself
it really is no big deal, but it was a big deal the first time i had to do these things but its how i learned
and i keep on learning

thanks for your post and reminding me of some of my past
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Re: July 4th any staying sober

Postby kdub720 » Thu Jul 13, 2017 9:03 am

Great topic, I am coming up on two years and have been doing really well. I went to my brothers childs birthday where everyone was drinking, people I had drank with in the past, but deffinently were not my friends. I just did expect it or I may not have gone. I had to leave after an hour. I find it easy to surround myself with good friends who support my sobriety. Coming up on two years and in an unexpected environment, bailing was the best choice. Maybe I am not doing as well as I thought considering I felt uncomfortable. Great post, This had me thinking this morning.
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Re: July 4th any staying sober

Postby Duke » Thu Jul 13, 2017 10:48 am

Hi Amy. How'd your fourth go? Well, I hope.

I was just talking to a friend this morning about this topic. I'm one of those blessed to have had the desire to drink removed after my first meeting and yet to return. But, I have had plenty of times that situations I've gotten into have made me uncomfortable. I've learned to listen to those feelings. If I'm uncomfortable, there's a reason.

Sometimes, I need an attitude adjustment and sometimes, I just need to accept that the activity is one I should pass on. Common sense is a pretty good guide.

Best of luck to you.
"If you are humble nothing will touch you, neither praise nor disgrace, because you know what you are.", Mother Teresa
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