Coming Back

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Coming Back

Postby jbscoot » Tue Nov 15, 2016 3:09 am

I have finally found my way back into the rooms due to miraculous circumstances with a chance meeting of someone so unlikely to have helped me! After loosing and caring for both my amazing parents I was alone lost and drinking as I was in a state of chronic relapse. Now I am attending meetings, have incredible people from AA in my life again who are supporting me on my journey back to sobriety during this difficult time and am SO grateful. If it wasn't for this divine intervention God only knows what would have happened to me. Need all the support I can get!! :)
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Re: Coming Back

Postby avaneesh912 » Tue Nov 15, 2016 5:10 am

Welcome back. Look around and post questions. Hope you realize if you are an alcoholic, only a spiritual awakening will help.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Coming Back

Postby clouds » Tue Nov 15, 2016 5:30 am

Hi! Welcome back Jb. :)

Thanks for sharing your enthusiasm and hope with us.

Taking action on the 12 steps in my life was the thing I needed to keep sober. Some of the work I did in AA from reading the AA book, Alcoholics Anonymous and taking the steps changed my life in a way I didn't even know was possible. Its what gave me on-going sobriety and happiness that is different from the happiness I sought when I started drinking.

Best wishes on findng a good home group and a person who can lead you through the steps, or a step group meeting.
Reading here on e-aa will give you some resources for step work too.
" Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house." page 98 A.A.
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Re: Coming Back

Postby jbscoot » Tue Nov 15, 2016 5:48 am

Thank you all for welcoming me......have been in AA 20 years and had 10 years of recovery before I stopped meetings. We all know what happens then and I am one of the lucky ones through the Grace of God made it back. So look forward to being here and getting support 24/7. Thank you all!!!
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Re: Coming Back

Postby jbscoot » Tue Nov 15, 2016 5:49 am

avaneesh912 wrote:Welcome back. Look around and post questions. Hope you realize if you are an alcoholic, only a spiritual awakening will help.
Will do!
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Re: Coming Back

Postby jbscoot » Tue Nov 15, 2016 5:50 am

avaneesh912 wrote:Welcome back. Look around and post questions. Hope you realize if you are an alcoholic, only a spiritual awakening will help.
Absolutely only God can do for me what I can not do for myself.....so appreciate the support.
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Re: Coming Back

Postby desypete » Wed Nov 16, 2016 12:28 pm

i loose count of the same old patten that happens, people come to aa in a bad way then they start to get well again, they think they have done the steps and dont need the rooms anymore and before you know it there right back in the mess again
the old timers who keep on coming back for many 10s of years know only to well what would happen to them should they decide to stay at home and watch tv or play on there computers instead of being around drunks in the meetings
its simple we forget, all the pain all the suffering it just loses its power if not reminded of it often

i speak from experience as i myself came to the rooms and stuck around for about 3 years, i got what they call super sober, i could tell you all what your doing wrong, i could quote the book at you trying to hide my real self behind it i honestly sounded like a good aa memeber in the rooms as i simply knew what to say that would please the others, but there was no real brutal honesty in me

not like today as today i dont give a monkey how i sound as i am not interested in being seen as some sort of wise guru my ego took a right battering from the booze the last time i put that fake mask on

15 years i stayed sober or dry then i picked up 1 drink just to see if i would end up drunk in a heap like i came to believe would happen

well i didnt end up in a heap instead i had the one drink and went home no trouble at all, i had made myself promises when i took that first drink that if i did end up in a drunken state or a police cell etc i would know aa was right and i would stop there and the
so i got away with having that 1 drink, so i went and had another go but i thought to myself i might as well try it with 2 drink this time

nothing bad happend to me after the 2 drinks
now i was starting to think maybe i am not an alcoholic at all maybe now that i am much older i can not start to handle the booze

so i went out and had 4 drinks with my ex wife and had a great time, i was singing all the way home and happy it was the best night on the booze i had ever known
and my head now believed i could drink like a gentlemen and the old timers in aa should all take there hats off to me as i could drink and drink normally

i dont know when it all started to go wrong but sure enough i started to get drunk and do stupid things or sometimes bad things, ending up in court facing drunk and disorderly charges then fighting, so facing assult charges, then criminal damage charges or abusive charges the list is endless and growing but now the booze had hold of me again
no matter what the trouble i ended up i had excuses for why it was i drank or i could blame someone else for the trouble

on and on this went for 8 years i ended up losing my business as i couldnt get up in the mornings, i lost my kids to social services as there lives were going down hill as me and my ex wife ending up battling drunks having the police called around the home many many times and each of us getting locked up over and over again it was like a game to me and my ex once drunk we would call the police alleging domestic violence had taken place and they would come and arrest either her or me, it seemed like a good way to get some peace for the night and to carry on drinking

anyway i ended up going to prison and my ex wife was lucky as she kicked 2 police men one night when they were arresting her and she was charged with 2 assaults and if she were a man she would of been sent to prison however she got away with it and got a fine

when we lost the kids we blamed each other and the fights got worse, we hated each other but to afraid to be apart as no one else would have either of us and we knew it

finaly i came back to aa once i could no longer live that way any more, once the booze couldn't get me out of the mental suffering and shame and guilt i was trying to hide from

i had no money left, just an empty flat that was given to me by a charity trying to help people like me to get there lives back and i was going to lose it as i just couldnt get off the drink which by now had progressed to daily drunks as i couldn't get sober

all that mess and carnage could of been avoided if i had never left aa if i had kept on coming back like was first ever suggested
so today because of my own experience of what the booze did to me i know only to well that i will keep on coming back no matter what my head tells me, or what is good on TV

today i keep on coming back trying to tell others to keep on coming back and that includes those who have years being sober but have stopped coming to the meetings, i honestly dont want what happend to me to happen to anyone else but i am powerless as once an alcoholic makes up there mind they dont need aa any more they simple stop coming back

thankfully the doors to aa are always open thanks to those guys who keep on coming back and help to run the meetings who are giving back to what was given to them for free
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Re: Coming Back

Postby Spirit Flower » Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:05 pm

desypete is right on. I've seen so many people try the experiment of the first drink. I have not tried it myself. I know if I did try it, I'd be exactly the same as pete described.

Normal people don't have to try experiments. Only real alcoholics.
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Re: Coming Back

Postby ezdzit247 » Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:26 pm

Hi jbscoot and welcome back!

I can relate. I was a chronic relapser for almost two years after my first AA meeting, finally got sober, and then relapsed again just before what would have been my second AA birthday. I probably thought I was recovered from this cunning, baffling and powerful disease called alcoholism but getting drunk again was a very humbling experience and a wake up call for me. It smashed the delusion that I was "like other people, or presently may be", real quick. Today, and for a long time now, I haven't found it necessary to pick up that first drink again or do any more personal research projects.... :lol:

Glad you here. Keep coming back.....
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Re: Coming Back

Postby David A » Thu Nov 17, 2016 1:16 am

From one person who has relapsed and come back to another... big welcome back buddy.

You are wanted and needed very directly, JB. Whenever a member starts consistently showing up and sharing their experience, strength, and hope about what it was like for them before and after they quit drinking, it strengthens the group. It strengthens AA.

So thank you for strengthening AA with this very positive and honest thread. And thank you to everyone for contributing. Grateful for this website & its inhabitants. Grateful to be alive and living a life free from the living hell that is active alcoholism. So grateful to be free to live life... even when it hurts.

Nothing left to do but smile, smile, smile. :mrgreen:

ps --
ezdzit247 wrote:or do any more personal research projects.... :lol:


This made me laugh! :lol: Boy do I relate.
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Re: Coming Back

Postby Brock » Thu Nov 17, 2016 12:24 pm

desypete said -
today i keep on coming back trying to tell others to keep on coming back and that includes those who have years being sober but have stopped coming to the meetings...but i am powerless as once an alcoholic makes up there mind they dont need aa any more they simple stop coming back

Because a person does not come back to meetings it doesn’t mean they have turned their backs on AA or don't need it anymore, they may be quite happily practicing the principles they have learned while living a happy and contented life, but what you say right after I agree with 100% -
thankfully the doors to aa are always open thanks to those guys who keep on coming back and help to run the meetings who are giving back to what was given to them for free.

We owe a debt to the fellowship and pay it by giving back, and hopefully that's the only reason we need meetings. Because some speak as if we will slip without them, we will forget what we were like unless we see other new struggling members to remind us. This makes the entire program look less effective than it is, and gives new people the impression that it's meetings that keep us going, and maybe for some that is true.

But for those who have found what the book says true- “We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed.” These people will not wish to live one day without doing the things that make them feel that way, and those are found in steps 10 & 11, and we don't need meetings to do those. If someone needs meetings to stay sober or remind them where they came from go right ahead, but that's not what the program says, so we in turn should not speak as if it's something the literature suggests we must do. Right here we have one member who stopped attending for something like thirty years, and another who lived for years where there were none. All over the world there are people who need the solution this program offers, who because of their living or job location meetings will either be few or even none, it's not fair to make it sound like they have no hope.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: Coming Back

Postby jbscoot » Fri Nov 18, 2016 8:30 am

Appreciate all the support and stories about coming back.....I grew arrogant that I did not need AA and boy was I wrong! Now I need to learn here how to post Quotes!!!
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Re: Coming Back

Postby jbscoot » Fri Nov 18, 2016 8:32 am

clouds wrote:Hi! Welcome back Jb. :)

Thanks for sharing your enthusiasm and hope with us.

Taking action on the 12 steps in my life was the thing I needed to keep sober. Some of the work I did in AA from reading the AA book, Alcoholics Anonymous and taking the steps changed my life in a way I didn't even know was possible. Its what gave me on-going sobriety and happiness that is different from the happiness I sought when I started drinking.

Best wishes on findng a good home group and a person who can lead you through the steps, or a step group meeting.
Reading here on e-aa will give you some resources for step work too.
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Re: Coming Back

Postby jbscoot » Sat Nov 19, 2016 6:56 am

[quote="jbscoot"][quote=
thankfully the doors to aa are always open thanks to those guys who keep on coming back and help to run the meetings who are giving back to what was given to them for free"avaneesh912"] I am so grateful for the amazing people who have welcomed me back and have a sposor already who has many years of sobriety.
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Re: Coming Back

Postby PaigeB » Sat Nov 19, 2016 11:43 am

Keep trying

(quote) have to be sure to keep the text in between the quote brackets. I purposefully used the wrong ones so they would show in the text(quote)
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
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