Is it really One Day at a Time?

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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby Noels » Mon Sep 05, 2016 9:18 pm

I must be very honest here. If I pick up a drink again after all ive learned and experienced in the past year of being sober it's not gonna be because of a blind spot . It's gonna be because I WANTED to. Perhaps I don't get the blind spot concept or perhaps I think its simply a way for us to justify if we've failed - once again? I do pray however that I don't ever need to find out exactly which one it is.
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby PaigeB » Mon Sep 05, 2016 9:19 pm

My experience was being her friend during this time of her struggle. I noticed that she kept feeding the thought that maybe she was not alcoholic because she told me.

I never said she was spiritually fit and then suddenly drank - I said she suffered from her thoughts for a year before she drank. What she DIDNT do was keep going to meetings, share her problems, work through the Steps again or at least do a new Step 4 through 9. She slowly stepped away from the Fellowship and service and working DAILY on her Spirit. Instead she worked daily on her problems until it drove her mad and she finally drank.

We are not cured, we have a daily reprieve. We must remain vigilant.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby D'oh » Mon Sep 05, 2016 9:57 pm

From tonight's reading. He Sold Himself Short.

A few months after I made my original trip to Akron I was feeling pretty cocky, and I didn't think my wife was treating me with proper respect, now that I was an outstanding citizen. So I set out to get drunk deliberately, just to teach her what she was missing. A week later, I had to get an old friend from Akron to spend two days sobering me up. That was my lesson, that one could not take the moral inventory and then file it away; that the alcoholic has to continue to take inventory every day if he expects to get well and stay well. That was my only slip. It taught me a valuable lesson.


A Pioneering Member, that started AA in Chicago.

Not everyone's thought, but just a look at the Mental Twists.
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby avaneesh912 » Tue Sep 06, 2016 3:14 am

and I didn't think my wife was treating me with proper respect, now that I was an outstanding citizen. So I set out to get drunk deliberately, just to teach her what she was missing.


So you don't see the resentment in this? The wife not treating him with proper respect for being an outstanding citizen?

In the working of the 4th step it talks about this. "When the spiritual malady is overcome we straighten out mentally and physically". And thats what the 10th step warning states too. Of being spiritual fit.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby avaneesh912 » Tue Sep 06, 2016 3:33 am

Perhaps I don't get the blind spot concept or perhaps I think its simply a way for us to justify if we've failed - once again?


The blind spot is beautifully illustrated by the Fred the accountant story. Where he vehemently denies he has a problem and the good AAers try the best. Tell him about the disease but leave. And the story goes on to say he went his merry way (after the discharge from hospital). He depends on his will power. Eventually he caves in-to the idea that he could handle 'a couple'. Then he comes back to the same hospital and narrates his story and he tells how he was caught off-guard (hits the blank spot). Of course here we are talking about a person who has not accepted that he is an alcoholic. Man there are so many of them in our community. All intellectuals and well placed and they do not believe they have a problem. The guy who went with me to Punta Cana always looks at others and says they are the ones who need BillW. Yet, last 3 days (this being a long weekend) he was nursing a hangover. It was the Cigars that caused that. But one gentleman did want to hear my story and took the big book and some cds from me this weekend. I am all excited about it.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby avaneesh912 » Tue Sep 06, 2016 3:54 am

We are not cured, we have a daily reprieve. We must remain vigilant.


Nobody is denying that. Thats why we have the tools. Prayer and Meditation plays an important role. I would say, meditation for me is much bigger than prayers. I love what Clarence Snyder used to say. Prayer is asking and Meditation is about receiving guidance from our higher power. Acceptance of life the way it is is also a key part of the journey. When we accept the isness of the situation, I don't have to write inventory or make amends later.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby D'oh » Tue Sep 06, 2016 4:22 am

In the working of the 4th step it talks about this. "When the spiritual malady is overcome we straighten out mentally and physically". And thats what the 10th step warning states too. Of being spiritual fit.


Most Definitely.

Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee--Thy will (not mine) be done.” These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.
pg.85

So you don't see the resentment in this? The wife not treating him with proper respect for being an outstanding citizen?


But I did not write it, He did. As little warning that it is a Daily Reprieve.

When we retire at night, we constructively review our day. Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest or afraid?
pg.86
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby avaneesh912 » Tue Sep 06, 2016 5:01 am

More importantly see the workings of the 10th step. Thats how we carry through out the day. We catch the malady before it gets out of control. The point I was trying to make is, you have the 'mental twists' like you were pointing out to me, is after we allow the internal unmanageability gets out of control. We don't go from all spiritual and get thirsty. There is a phase where we let the guard down.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby PaigeB » Tue Sep 06, 2016 10:30 am

We can talk about Step 10...

But we should be talking about the fact that you don't just get to Step 10. You have to WORK this program. By the time we get to 10 we have practiced and experienced Steps 1-9, but that does not mean they are not longer useful. I recently went back and made a personal re-commitment to Steps 1-3. Then, with my sponsor 4-9 and As of this weekend, I had a new and frankly magical experience from that WORK. Magical, but it was still work.

It was still doing DAILY what was in front of me to do and accepting that I cannot do it all in a day & tomorrow I could do more. I believe, even though I have been through the Steps and had more than one spiritual experience, that this is the very essence of living one day at a time.
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby Brock » Tue Sep 06, 2016 10:55 am

We don't go from all spiritual and get thirsty. There is a phase where we let the guard down.

Of course this is right, but jump high jump low, our friend D'oh is going to say all we have is a daily reprieve. Paige's friend talks about maybe trying a few drinks for a whole year, then falls off the wagon, in 'Sold Himself Short,' who knows how long it took for the resentment against his wife to build to breaking point, once again D'oh says “warning that it is a Daily Reprieve,” with capital letters included, maybe he will underline it next.

What does it matter, why do I not just let him keep saying it? Because I believe we all have a responsibility to make our program look as good and hopeful as we know it is, and not to allow someone to continually represent it as something that lasts for one day, then must be renewed or else we drink, who is going to buy in to a pathetic program like that. Then he will put up the part about each day we must carry God's will into our activities, and what would happen the first day you don't, you guessed it, straight to the bar you go.

As much as he says this, I will continue to say for those looking for some hope in a program that is stronger than one day, that after we do the steps and are living in the solution. We can stop carrying God's will, we can stop praying, we can be selfish cussing bastards, the scum of the earth, but we don't know for how long. But if we have to believe that all the good works we have done, will not give us more than a one day reprieve, we would not be encouraged to do them in the first place. Thankfully we have found, that by doing what is asked in 10 11 & 12, we have a happy life, so we have every reason to continue along this path, but if you wonder off the path, you should not be told the next day your ass will be grass, because that's not what the book says.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby whipping post » Tue Sep 06, 2016 1:45 pm

If I were brand new and looking for a solution the comment in this thread that would scare me the most is that we have to work with other alcoholics intensively on a daily basis. When I came in I got that impression from the people that I saw attending every meeting in town. There is no way I have time for that nor do the majority of the AA members that I know.
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby Stepchild » Tue Sep 06, 2016 3:21 pm

If I were brand new and looking for a solution the comment in this thread that would scare me the most is that we have to work with other alcoholics intensively on a daily basis. When I came in I got that impression from the people that I saw attending every meeting in town. There is no way I have time for that nor do the majority of the AA members that I know.


Not to mention it goes against what the founders tell us...

None of us makes a sole vocation of this work, nor do we think its effectiveness would be increased if we did. We feel that elimination of our drinking is but a beginning. A much more important demonstration of our principles lies before us in our respective homes, occupations and affairs.
pg 19

Because I believe we all have a responsibility to make our program look as good and hopeful as we know it is, and not to allow someone to continually represent it as something that lasts for one day, then must be renewed or else we drink, who is going to buy in to a pathetic program like that.


This is definitely a much easier sell....Maybe if you haven't experienced this...It would be hard to transmit it.

We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us.
pg 85
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby D'oh » Tue Sep 06, 2016 4:17 pm

Thankfully we have found, that by doing what is asked in 10 11 & 12, we have a happy life, so we have every reason to continue along this path, but if you wonder off the path, you should not be told the next day your ass will be grass, because that's not what the book says.


So, when does one do Step 10, or 11, or 12? Step 10 on Tuesdays and Thursdays, 11, Fri, Mon, and Weds? And Step 12 if asked on Sat and Sun. When does one Practice these Principles in All our Affairs?

As for the New Comer being confused in all of this. Isn't One Day at a Time for them? It is the Old Timers saying "We no longer fear drink, if temped, we recoil from it. This has magically been removed"

But this program is more than Not taking a drink one day or year at a time. It is a Spiritual way of Living. It is a Gift that I never wish to take for granted, or believe I own again. If that means doing the 3rd Step every morning, then I will do that.
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby avaneesh912 » Tue Sep 06, 2016 5:32 pm

I would like to hear your thoughts on how you carry Gods will? Maybe we can learn something instead of going around and around.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Is it really One Day at a Time?

Postby D'oh » Tue Sep 06, 2016 7:57 pm

I would like to hear your thoughts on how you carry Gods will? Maybe we can learn something instead of going around and around.


Good One. I have been learning all along, I was going to come back from the Meeting tonight and thank everyone. But we must share. I will go first.

My wife's old Laptop, barely held together but I like tinkering on that sort of stuff. Well occasionally out of the blue, the Keyboard quits working. I take that as "Words Not meant to be typed". Before I would Fuss, Cuss, and tear it apart until I found out how to get my thoughts in text.
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