I am surprised by the amount of responses already. I took a lot from what you all said. I appreciate you taking the time to reply, so I will take the time to acknowledge and respond.
johnd: Thanks for the help and support. It means a lot.
becksdad, Jaywalker Steve, Patter, AlisonT, kenyal, Mike O: You are all right, I need to start giving back. Period.
MitchellK: You hit the nail on the head. We got sober to be happy, sometimes i feel like some meetings are cesspools of negativity. The actions we do outside of meetings are far more important. Maybe I should start volunteering for non-profits, etc
ann2: Sounds like you are in an AWESOME space spiritually. I am in a terrible one. I will get into more details below...
Marc L: I can really relate to your first post. What is the website? However, regarding your second and third posts, I wish there was a sarcasm font, then I would understand what your mean by your reply. Yeah I get the whole "SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP AA", I've had plenty of it and frankly, it does nothing for me. I'm not "offended" or any of that nonsense, I just would like to hear more rational arguments backed with facts than dog-commands and belittling. However, if you were being sarcastic, then my response is LOL.
To reiterate, you all make very good points. I think my course of action should be:
1. Start giving back, whether it be AA or volunteering. I've done lots of volunteer work in the past and i feel great afterwards
2. Develop some sort of relationship with a higher power. THIS IS GOING TO BE HARD. I was raised Catholic, went to church weekly, and have a huge grudge against organized religion and the Christian idea of God. I am a scientist by trade and consider myself fairly educated. This also does not bode well for belief in God. I really really REALLY want to believe but, to me, God is a human construct which we create to mentally defend us from our impending death and the eternal nothingness which follows. Has anyone else had Higher Power problems like this? I may create a new thread about this as well.
Last edited by SouthofBoston
on Wed Jan 23, 2013 3:04 pm, edited 2 times in total.