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Upcoming Holidays

PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2016 10:29 pm
by jjjjiggs
Hello- first time here- I am not sure I am in the right place- but need help :)
My Sister lived with us for a year- before my husband and I totally clued in and got out of denial that she has a serious alcohol abuse problem, but really is some form of being an alcoholic. Eventually after countless issue and drama, we asked her to move out. Now there is no contact between her and any family at all. With the holidays coming up, I still want to reach out to her to join us and have some sort of meaningful relationship, at the very least, communication. The last time we heard from her (2 months ago).

We are a very large family, and my question is: Is it reasonable to invite her to come here for an evening and insist she have no alcohol? I can't get past letting her make that decision herself, as I feel like I am contributing to her problem. Kind of hypocritical.

I appreciate any insight, thanks.

J

Re: Upcoming Holidays

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2016 4:10 am
by PuppyEars
Hello welcome to the forum!
If your loved one is that serious of a drinker, me thinks it doesn't matter what you insist, they will find a way to sneak a few behind your back. At least that is what I did when in similar situations.
I don't have a full answer but hope to maybe move you closer to a solution.
Happy holidays.

Re: Upcoming Holidays

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2016 6:13 am
by avaneesh912
if you take away alcohol from an alcoholic, you are left with a mean being. If you want to have such person around, its a decision you have to make.

Re: Upcoming Holidays

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2016 6:56 am
by Spirit Flower
Its only one night. Accept her as she is.

Re: Upcoming Holidays

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2016 9:40 am
by jjjjiggs
Thanks for the insight. All of your responses have very good points. In the end, I am not sure if she will even reply to our contact or actually show up.

Thanks for your help