Promises! Promises! - More Bad Jokes?

"... We absolutely insist on enjoying life" (p. 132, Alcoholics Anonymous). Here's the forum for fun and frivolity. Enjoy!

Re: Promises! Promises! - More Bad Jokes?

Postby kdub720 » Fri Jun 09, 2017 9:04 am

I just found this joke thread, and it is what I needed to day before work. Thank you?

Why did superman flush the toilet?...

Because it was his duty
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Re: Promises! Promises! - More Bad Jokes?

Postby JohnDaniels » Fri Jun 09, 2017 2:30 pm

A guy was standing on the corner messing in his pants

Someone walked up to him and said, "Man you stink!"

Stinky replied, "Yeah I know I stink. I'm messing in my pants".

The other man said, "Why?"

Stinky replied, "Well ... I don't really know".

The other man said, "Look. A friend of mine is a really good psychiatrist. I know if you go see him he will help you find out why you stand on this street corner messing in your pants. What-a-ya say? Would you like his number?"

Stinky replied, "Okay".

Two weeks went by and there was Stinky standing on the corner again messing in his pants

The other man met up with him once again and said, "MAN you stink! Didn't you go see my psychiatrist friend?"

Stinky replied, "Yeah I did".

The other man said, "Well? Did you find out why you're messing in your pants all the time?"

Stinky replied, "Yeah, but it don't bother me now."
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Re: Promises! Promises! - More Bad Jokes?

Postby JohnDaniels » Tue Jun 13, 2017 5:49 pm

A group of women unable to take birth control pills were at a Birth Control Support Group.

They went around the room sharing what worked for them.

1st woman: "Well I can't take birth control pills so here's what my husband and I have found to work. I use an I.U.D. and we have found it to be successful."

2nd woman: "I can't take birth control pills either, so I use a Coil. It works for my husband and I."

3rd woman: "I can't use birth control pills either, so we use the Rhythm Method. So far it works well for us."

4th woman: "Like the rest of you, I can't use birth control pills either so I use a cervical cap. It works for us also."

5th woman: "I can't take birth control pills either so I had my husband snipped. It works great."

6th woman: "I can't take birth control pills either. The method my husband and I use is somewhat different from the rest of you.
We use The Golf Ball and Pail Method. See, my husband is a Jockey who stands 5 feet tall. I am 6 feet tall.
So we have sexual intercourse standing up with my husband standing on a pail.
He looks me in the eyes and when I see his eyes get as big as golf balls, I kick the pail out from under him"
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