You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

"... We absolutely insist on enjoying life" (p. 132, Alcoholics Anonymous). Here's the forum for fun and frivolity. Enjoy!

Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Astrid » Fri May 09, 2014 5:30 am

Ok, but nobody can top mine. I mean who does that? I love how alcohol makes anything seem acceptable. It's actually pretty scary.
"The difficulty lies in our own imagination. It takes time to overcome the restrictions that we place on our own ideas." - John Tabak PhD 'History of Mathematics'
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Tosh » Fri May 09, 2014 6:12 pm

Astrid wrote:Ok, but nobody can top mine. I mean who does that? I love how alcohol makes anything seem acceptable. It's actually pretty scary.


I think I can top yours, but it's too disgusting to put on this forum. :lol:
Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again, come, come.” Rumi (No sniggering from the sex addicts)
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby BlackedOut » Thu May 15, 2014 2:38 am

I'm depressed right now, so these don't seem funny to me -- at least not at the moment. I'm also still raw from my episode of blacking out last night. Luckily, I was home safe, though. I'm just waiting for a reply to messages I left, and finding more goodies on this forum to read. I'm feeling to ashamed maybe, and I might have to go back to the more serious forums... :?
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Lali » Sat May 17, 2014 10:08 pm

First and foremost, we must understand that alcoholism is a very serious disease. This disease kills, it tears families apart, it humiliates.

The Big Book says that once we attain freedom from the bondage of alcohol, we will become happy, joyous and free. When that occurs, we find that it is okay to have a sense of humor about things. I do totally understand where you are coming from, Julie. So please don't mistake our chuckling here as downplaying the horrific things that occur when we are in active alcoholism.

Believe me when I tell you that active alcoholism, whether it is we ourselves who are alcoholic or it is our parent or child or spouse, is no joke.
Step 1: I can't
Step 2: He can
Step 3: I think I'll let him
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby tomsteve » Fri Dec 19, 2014 10:49 am

1. You can’t drive your motorcycle because you might break the glass bottles in the saddlebags.

Or because it is better to use 2 Hands and one holds a beer.
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby tomsteve » Fri Dec 19, 2014 10:54 am

BlackedOut wrote:I'm depressed right now, so these don't seem funny to me -- at least not at the moment. I'm also still raw from my episode of blacking out last night. Luckily, I was home safe, though. I'm just waiting for a reply to messages I left, and finding more goodies on this forum to read. I'm feeling to ashamed maybe, and I might have to go back to the more serious forums... :?



When I got into AA I remember standing outside meetings afterwards listening to people crack jokes and laughing. There I was thinking," I know that's funny as hell but I'm not laughing. I want to laugh!!!"

Then I worked the steps.
Now I can laugh at a lot of the insanity I did because today I can see I was insane and my actions were,too.
But underneath it all is a seriousness. I know how cunning,baffling,powerful,patient, and deadly this illness is.

We aren't a gum lot AFTER we work the steps,have a spiritual awakening and recover from the seeming less hopeless state of body and mind.
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Niagara » Fri Dec 19, 2014 11:01 am

You got caught peeing in the garden, on your very posh neighbours CCTV....because you were a) too drunk to get up the stairs to the bathroom and b) didn't have a clue they'd had CCTV installed.
If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month -
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Lali » Fri Dec 19, 2014 11:33 am

Oh, girl, you DIDN'T! :mrgreen:
Step 1: I can't
Step 2: He can
Step 3: I think I'll let him
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Niagara » Fri Dec 19, 2014 3:26 pm

Yes, yes I did. :oops:
If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month -
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Lali » Fri Dec 19, 2014 10:07 pm

Can you imagine their faces when they saw the tape? :shock: LOL
Step 1: I can't
Step 2: He can
Step 3: I think I'll let him
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Pat82 » Sat Dec 20, 2014 11:12 am

You might be an alcoholic if:

You rush home Friday for a couple of drinks so you're not late to Happy Hour.

I did and I am one. :-)
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Tosh » Fri Jan 02, 2015 5:26 am

You might be an alcoholic if you drink to get stuff done, like wearing headphones and listen to music while hoovering the whole house from top to bottom only to discover you didn't plug it in.
Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again, come, come.” Rumi (No sniggering from the sex addicts)
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby Niagara » Fri Jan 02, 2015 5:34 am

:lol: :lol: :lol: priceless.
If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month -
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby brontoset » Tue Jan 27, 2015 5:02 pm

...You walk around the house talking to yourself in a british accent, pretending that you're a rock star and you're being interviewed by Rolling Stone magazine.
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Re: You Might Be An Alcoholic If?

Postby BlackedOut » Fri Apr 15, 2016 8:47 am

Too bad we can't like or upvote some of these. :D
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