The first week

For the younger AA generation, some experience, strength and hope.

The first week

Postby Rock884 » Wed Mar 30, 2016 5:46 pm

Hi Everyone,

I just can't seem to get through even one week. Im trying to be more social by working out at the gym and just in general but I still find myself failing. I know it is because I am trying to do this alone. I've been stuck in this cycle for 10 years now and im tired of it. My father is an alcoholic in denial so I can't talk to him. My best friend is in rehab for alcohol. And I'm alone in my recovery. I just feel like everyone around me believes I am not an alcoholic even if I admit to it and the problems it has caused me. Their denial to accept it makes it the hardest for me to quit. How did you get through the first week. And how do you deal with friends and family in denial of your alcoholism?
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Re: The first week

Postby Reborn » Wed Mar 30, 2016 6:24 pm

Well the first week is deffinitely hard. I spent my first 5 days in the hospital being medically detoxed...it doesn't sound like you're there yet. I would suggest getting to some AA meetings and let people know you're having a hard time...there are some really good members that are willing to talk to you day and night to get you through the early stages of sobriety. Recovery cannot be done alone...tried it doesn't work at all. The next suggestion is to get a Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous and read the Doctor's Opinion up to page 43...see if you can relate to what you read. That is how I made my beginning in AA. I can relate to those people out there that say you don't have a problem...most of the time I believe, they say these things because they don't want to look at their own drinking. Don't worry about the nay sayers and do this for you...its the hoola hoop theory...imagine you're standing in the middle of the hoola hoop...everything on the inside of the hoola hoop is your's to deal with...everything else is out of your control...welcome to eAA...glad you are here.
We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others. BB pg 132
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Re: The first week

Postby avaneesh912 » Thu Mar 31, 2016 3:33 am

And I'm alone in my recovery.


Thats what everybody thinks when we start the journey. You will be amazed the number of people who are in the rooms. Just matter of finding the right mix. There are several young people meetings where we live. In fact there are lot of weddings happen because of this. People do recover and fall in love and lead a normal life.

About others in denial. We can only allow them some room. There is lot of mis-information about this disease. It took some time for me wife to realize that this is a potent disease. Few people on both the sides croaked and it was then easy for her to understand the nature of the beast. Perhaps you can show few live cases in your circle.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: The first week

Postby ezdzit247 » Thu Mar 31, 2016 11:41 am

Rock884 wrote:Hi Everyone,

I just can't seem to get through even one week. Im trying to be more social by working out at the gym and just in general but I still find myself failing. I know it is because I am trying to do this alone. I've been stuck in this cycle for 10 years now and im tired of it. My father is an alcoholic in denial so I can't talk to him. My best friend is in rehab for alcohol. And I'm alone in my recovery. I just feel like everyone around me believes I am not an alcoholic even if I admit to it and the problems it has caused me. Their denial to accept it makes it the hardest for me to quit. How did you get through the first week. And how do you deal with friends and family in denial of your alcoholism?


Hi Rock and welcome.

Glad you found this forum!

AA has a pamphlet entitled "This is AA - An introduction to the AA recovery program" which will help answer your questions about how the program works. Most AA meetings have this pamphlet on their literature shelf or you can read it online by clicking on this link:

http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-1_thisisaa1.pdf.

I struggled with staying sober for almost two years after my first AA meeting when I was 27. I wanted the same kind of happy, comfortable sobriety that I saw others had in AA meeting rooms and could not understand why I kept getting drunk when what I really wanted was to be was sober. I finally got sober when I was 29 and discovered AA's 24 hour plan. Instead of telling myself I was never going to take another drink, I told myself I'm not going to drink TODAY. I began going to lots of AA meetings, at least one a day, and listened to other members share how they stayed sober, how they worked the Steps, how they overcame the wreckage of their pasts, how they applied AA's principles to their daily lives and more. I also talked to other AA members after the meetings, exchanged phone numbers, went out for coffee, made a lot of new sober friends and, one day at a time, I learned how to build a new life for myself without any need for alcohol using AA's tools and the experience, strength and hope I received from the fellowship. That's what worked for me.

Here's an excerpt from the pamphlet on AA's 24 hour plan:

"For example, we take no pledges, we don’t say that we will “never” drink again. Instead, we try to follow what we in A.A. call the “24-hour plan.” We concentrate on keeping sober just the current twenty-four hours. We simply try to get through one day at a time without a drink. If we feel the urge for a drink, we neither yield nor resist. We merely put off taking that particular drink until tomorrow…."

Keep coming back....
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Re: The first week

Postby Brock » Thu Mar 31, 2016 12:42 pm

Please keep in mind that any putting off of a drink until the next day, represents a struggle you may have for a relatively short time, this section of the leaflet immediately presides the section on the 12 steps. By the time we are half way through these, the majority of us felt an amazing lifting of the urge to drink, the book says the problem does not exist for us, and thinking of a drink is something alien to us.

As far as the friends and family in denial that should make no difference, the support you need will come from the AA group at first, and then the steps and living in the solution. If a friend or family member asks if you want a drink, just say no thanks it doesn’t agree with me, you really don't need their approval that a problem exists. Try a meeting or two you can't go wrong with this program, and best of luck to you.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: The first week

Postby avaneesh912 » Thu Mar 31, 2016 12:45 pm

But some push the drink to the next second..LOL. those are the ones who don't understand how the program works. Go to the big book like Brock pointed out, the problem does remove the obsession and help you lead a great life.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: The first week

Postby ezdzit247 » Thu Mar 31, 2016 1:38 pm

Thanks to the internet, there are many many online resources for people in recovery these days. The online Serenity Book Club has the 1st 164 pages of the BB available in html which you can browse through at your own pace by clicking on different chapters. It also has a handy word search feature at the top of each page for BB references on different topics like "fear", "anger", "resentment". "honesty". "willingness", etc. Here's a few more popular recovery websites you might want to browse as well:

Staying Cyber
12 Step Forum
Sober Recovery
AA Grapevine
AA Activeboard
AA Online Group
Step Chat
AAAgnostica

If you've haven't been to an AA meeting yet, the Step Chat website has 5 or 6 AA cyber meetings every day in real time where you can just log into and observe the format.

AA's online intergroup directory lists hundreds of different online AA meeting groups for young people, gays, atheists, agnostics, freethinkers, pilots, lawyers, doctors, nurses, law enforcement, etc. as well as meetings in languages
other than English. It's really interesting to browse the pages of listings and get a sense of how global our fellowship is: http://www.aa-intergroup.org/directory.php.

Please feel free to ask any questions you may have, Rock.
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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