20 years old.. New

[mxrethoret]

Hey Guys,

My name's Rich, and well, I'm an alcoholic. I've always told myself that I'm too young to be an alcoholic. All of my friends drink, and frankly its just the enviroment that constantly surrounds me (I'm in college and in a fraternity). Lately, about the past 5-6 months or so, I've noticed myself becoming a slave to my addiction. There would be days where I'd have someone buy me a fifth, sit in my apartment by myself, and drink the whole thing. I dont know why.. I guess its just because it made me feel good. About a couple months ago, I got a DUI and told myself that I'd "take a break for a little bit" from drinking. I went to AA meetings for about 3 weeks. Then, for some reason that I can't really explain, I got another fifth. And drank it in a night. Such started a cycle that continued for about the next month--not necessarily a fifth a day, but definitely some sort of alcoholic beverage every few days. Two days ago I reached an all time low. I was sitting in my room, drinking what was left of my captain morgan, skipping a final that I was in NO way prepared for, and I just felt so empty. So controlled.. So STUPID. Since then, I've reached the conclusion that I am without a doubt powerless over alcohol and need help. It's just a strange thought to me though, you know? The fact that I can NEVER have an alcoholic drink again. It doesnt help that my 21st birthday is less than a month away.. I mean, isnt everyone supposed to get totally trashed on their 21st?? My friends have already started making plans for my bday. Pub crawls, etc.. I want to tell my friends, but I'm scared of what they will say.. I've told my mom, who is also a recovering alcoholic, and she is extremely supportive. I feel like thats only gonna take me so far though. I need to connect with people from my age group that can relate to what its like being young and an alcoholic. So here I am. I'm looking into young persons AA's in my area, although I will not be able to get to them until after winter break when I leave back home from my parents pad. I'm thinking about going to AA meetings here but its a small town where everyone knows each other. It's just embarrassing, u know? I dunno what exactly I'm trying to get out of posting this, but it feels a bit better to write all this out. Any advice/encouragement would be greatly appreciated..

-Rich

[avaneesh912]

Alcoholism discriminates nobody. Some are born alcoholics and some grow to be one. Its like diabetes (type 1 and type 2). Unfortunately alcoholism is mental problem. It will trick into believe that its alright to take that first drink. And then the cravings kick in and we get drunk. Our Fellowship captured the experience of the first 100 alcoholics to show others exactly how they recovered from this condition. Its called Alcoholics Anonymous (aka Big Book). One particular story that is geared for young people is in "More About Alcoholism" Chapter. Here is the the portion of it:

A man of thirty was doing a great deal of spree drinking. He was very nervous in the morning after these bouts and quieted himself with more liquor. He
was ambitious to succeed in business, but saw that he would get nowhere if he drank at all. Once he started, he had no control whatever. He made up his mind
that until he had been successful in business and had retired, he would not touch another drop. An exceptional man, he remained bone dry for twenty-five
years and retired at the age of fifty-five, after a successful and happy business career. Then he fell victim to a belief which practically every alcoholic has
—that his long period of sobriety and self-discipline had qualified him to drink as other men. Out came his carpet slippers and a bottle. In two months he was
in a hospital, puzzled and humiliated. He tried to regulate his drinking for a while, making several trips to the hospital meantime. Then, gathering all his
forces, he attempted to stop altogether and found he could not. Every means of solving his problem which money could buy was at his disposal. Every attempt
failed. Though a robust man at retirement, he went to pieces quickly and was dead within four years. This case contains a powerful lesson. Most of us
have believed that if we remained sober for a long stretch, we could thereafter drink normally. But here is a man who at fifty-five years found he was just
where he had left off at thirty. We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again: “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.’’ Commencing to drink after a
period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever. If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion
that someday we will be immune to alcohol.
Young people may be encouraged by this man’s experience to think that they can stop, as he did, on their own will power. We doubt if many of them can
do it, because none will really want to stop, and hardly one of them, because of the peculiar mental twist already acquired, will find he can win out. Several of
our crowd, men of thirty or less, had been drinking only a few years, but they found themselves as helpless as those who had been drinking twenty years.

[mebill]

Hi Rich and welcome to e-AA,

Glad you found this site. It really helped me, and I have no doubt that what you learn here will also help you. There are some young people here on the fourms, so I'm sure they will chime in here shortly with what becoming sober was/is for them. Good for you (realizing and seeking help) for addiction! Watch out for that peer pressure. I remember what that was like in college also. I wouldn't worry too much about feeling embarrassed at a meeting. I'd venture everyone there has experienced the same or similiar feeling. It's just one of those hurdles you have to clear. You'll see, they will help you in ways that you cannot imagine. Life will get better!

Bill

[ann2]

Hi and welcome!

I got sober at 26 and many of my friends in AA were younger. They never had an issue with the turning 21 thing because there was never any difficulty in their getting alcohol -- 21 was simply not important.

I am blessed to have attended the Central European Region business meeting of Great Britain's AA service structure and I met the Young Peoples Representative. He was talking about the Young People's European Convention going on in Stockholm (enter EURYPAA in your search engine) and it looks awesome. On the meetings and links page are listings for several Young People's organizations -- in the United States alone, there are


EACYPAA, Eastern Area Conference of Young People in AA
NECYPAA, New England Conference of Young People in AA
SERCYPAA, South East Regional Conference of Young People in AA
WACYPAA, Western Area Conference of Young People in AA
ASCYPAA, Arizona State Conference of Young People in AA
ARKYPAA, Arkansas Konference by Young People in AA
ACYPAA, All California Young People in AA Round-Up
CCYPAA, Colorado Convention of Young People in AA
CSCYPAA, Connecticut State Conference of Young People in AA
FCYPAA, Florida Conference of Young People in AA
GCYPAA, Georgia Conference of Young People in AA
HICYPAA, Hawaiian Islands Conference of Young People in AA
ISCYPAA, Illinois State Conference of Young People in AA
KCYPAA, Kentucky Conference of Young People in AA
LASCYPAA, Louisiana State Conference of Young People in AA
MGYPAA, Maryland Gathering of Young People in AA
NHSCYPAA, New Hampshire State Conference of Young People in AA
GSYP, Garden State Young People’s Conference of AA
NCYPAA, North Carolina Conference of Young People in AA
OKYPAA, Oklahoma Young People in AA
DYPCAA, Downingtown Young Peoples Conference of AA
SCCYPAA, South Carolina Convention by Young People in AA
TCYPAA, Tennessee Conference of Young People in AA
TXSCYPAA, Texas State Conference of Young People in AA
HCYPAA, Houston Conference of Young People in AA
VSCYPAA, Virginia State Conference of Young People in AA
PSYPC, Puget Sound Young People’s Council
WICYPAA, Wisconsin Conference of Young People in AA

I don't know if you're in the states or closer to where I live, but if you need more Young People listings let me know your location and I will do the searching!

Check them out. The young members I met in Stockholm were just as sober and amazing as could be, and they had a disco night as well as karaoke, and let me tell you they could sing!

Ann

[leo72807]

Hey Rich,

Welcome man, I just want to say that you are not alone man. I just turned 20 in May, and god willing i will have 3 years sober on the 28th of July. When I first got sober at 17, i too had thoughts of "Im not going be able to drink on my 21st bday, Im never going to able to have champaign on my wedding day, etc." And i just want to let you know that if you are really sick of the way you feel right now with how things are - try this thing. You have nothing to loose. I did this program one day at a time, and i found a new group of friends that are all around the same age group as me who are sober like me. Im now a member of a YPAA (young people in A.A) group in my town and im having loads of fun sober. We have events, dances, comedy shows, costume parties, chili cook-offs, car shows, game nights, beach bonfires, movie nights, lock-ins - the fun never ends. There is so much love, and comradery, and plenty of debauchery And i dont feel alone or isolated anymore. I did the 12 steps with a man i looked up to who i asked to be my sponsor - and eventually i came to a point where it became O.K. to not drink for the rest of my life. One day at a time. This thing is free - we will show you the door, and give you the key but you have to be the one who walks through it

[MarcLacroix]

Hi Rich;
I'm Marc and I'm alcoholic.
Looks like you have the beginnings of a good first step.
You've realized you are powerless over alcohol and openly stated you are alcoholic.
So now look at the areas of your life which are unmanageable as a result of your alcohol consumption.
Doing this will help you understand what step one means and how it applies to you.
Be fearless and thorough... You won't regret it.

Marc