Page 1 of 2

Hi...I uhhhhh...have an idea that might be helpful

PostPosted: Thu Feb 05, 2009 6:35 pm
by Norwejn
:idea:
Especially to the newcomers. This might be a bit 'ego-centric' for many, however, I think it would serve as proof to the newcomer that this program WORKS and also as a means to identify those with significant time for various reasons.

On our "Author" heading within the forums there are defaults. 'Joined', 'Post count' 'Location' as well as a title above our avatars.

Is there any way we can have our SOBRIETY DATE contained within those fields?

PostPosted: Thu Feb 05, 2009 9:09 pm
by jak
You could post one strip of bacon for each anniversary in your signature area. :)

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2009 8:50 pm
by bowlerdawg
jmo

on other boards they have an anniversary ( sticky ) thread, where everybody list there dates

PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2009 3:58 am
by 120808
Though I understand it's all about today, I think it's a noteworthy part of one's bios. Of course, one could populate their location with their date if they so choose.

Lucky for me, I knew not to use my usual handle from other forums because it's so unique that I might get recognized, so I chose my date as my user name.

One strip of Bacon per year

PostPosted: Tue Feb 17, 2009 3:19 pm
by Heidi K.
Oh Jak - - love your idea - - love your sense of humor.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhhhhhh

I just wrote to Norwejn that the bacon in his photo needs turning !!!


On a serious note- I personally don't often disclose my sobriety date,
seems people see you differently once they know. Oh it's great the first few years, but as time goes one - as it does - One Day at a Time -
there is a reaction. I just say that I have been in A.A. quite a few
24hrs. and leave it at that.

However - A.A. Birthdays are important - and a ePat on the eBack would be nice.

Heidi K.

PostPosted: Sun Mar 01, 2009 7:42 pm
by LetgoJoe
I'm Joe and I'm an alcoholic.

And being new here, I find it somewhat refreshing not knowing sobriety dates or people knowing mine. There can be a negative side to the sobriety dates even though it is not suppose to be thought of that way. I have seen guys with 25 years be miserable and walk out of meetings. I have come to realize that we all have clay feet and even though someone has a lot of time they are also only one drink away from being refunded their misery.

And even in face to face meetings (where I am at anyway) we do the chips in about half of our meetings when we have anniversaries, which is really only when we announce sobriety dates and that is only a suggested part of the program, of course. Also, in my locality, a persons sobriety date is treated somewhat anonymous - by that I mean, we normally don't just walk up to a guy and ask him what his sobriety date is. A few people in our entire area insist on letting us know each meeting how much time they have and it comes off like they are wearing it like armor because those guys seem to come off as lecturing rather than sharing. AND that is not invisible to the newcomer. In other words, it seems to suggest a hierarchy if it is over emphasized.

So, I guess what I am saying, in example is that, say a guy with 20 or 30 years is having a rough time and posts a discussion about it and then a guy with less time sober sees the discussion feels the spirit of the program to share about what he sees because he is outside of it or more objective and knows he has gotten to a better place through it by working the program - he may look over and see THIRTY YEARS next to his name and think... man who am I to offer up anything to a guy that has 30 years. Hec, man I'm thinking it now with the forum titles, LOL.

People can see the time marking success (chips) of the program in face to face meetings. Personally I put more emphasis on the true spirit of AA’s steps, traditions and program overall in what my fellow recovering alcoholics have to say and I hope I am staying in the same frame when I share. I also hope that people remind me when I am not. I am amazed at the incredible amount of knowledge in the program people have on this forum site. You people are soo helpful for my recovery.

Hey I just realized I have 6 posts on here now! Sweet, when can I collect a Forum's chip? heh heh :wink:

So, I am a forum's newcomer, and I am starting to ramble so I will keep reading and shut-up :roll: Thx for letting me share

re: Hi... uhhh ... I have an idea - etc.

PostPosted: Mon Mar 02, 2009 8:55 am
by Heidi K.
Welcome 120808 from PA. Hope to hear more from you.

And Joe, you made some good points there. We all seem to go on our own personal experience, and for me during the first week, month, year - I found 7 yrs. or 12 yrs. or 20 yrs. very unsettling.
I was struggling that day - and how would I ever continue this kind of struggle for a year, 20 yrs. etc.
I had to learn not to look down the road. I had to learn that by being in a meeting with these 'Old Timers' I have evidence right in front of me that the AA Program WORKS.
Okay, I have over 20 yrs. myself now. I still don't 'offer' my years in
AA - exept privately to some members - and I don't like hearing the same person announce his 37 years at almost every meeting. I've heard them called 'Bleeding Deacons' - might even be in the BB.

It's Monday, the sun is shining, enjoy THIS day, and I can say:
I'm grateful to God and AA for this day of Sobriety.

Hey 120808 - - Congratulations! You'll get your 3 mos. Coin very soon.
Go to Meetings and don't drink inbetween.
Greetings from Michigan,
Heidi K.

PostPosted: Mon Mar 02, 2009 1:34 pm
by martin08
My sobriety date and my "Returned to Sanity" date are quite a few months apart - not to be confusing. 8)

My experience is that the number of years away from a drink is not the always best measure of the quality of sobriety. There are many members that I know with 20 plus years away from a drink and I wouldn't want a split-second of what they have - restlessness, irritability and discontentment. i.e. My first Sponsor with 13 years spent the majority of time telling me why he should have just killed his ex-wife and taken the prison sentence instead of the court ruling in the divorce. I lasted only a couple of months with this guy and may as well have been his Sponsor or at least charged him for the therapy sessions!

Others might posess the altruistic qualities and Vital Spitirual Experiences that represent recovery in a very short period of a few weeks or months. At nine month's sober, a recovered man convinced my Sponsor (who was 9 years dry and dangerously insane) that some real action could take place that would destroy selfishness, take away the obsession to drink forever, and bring to him an existence that was more useful and rewarding than any life imaginable.

All that said.... I think that a sobriety date is a dandy option, if one so chooses to put it in their personal information.

PostPosted: Tue Mar 03, 2009 1:44 pm
by Blue Moon
Yes, sobriety time is not as relevant as some may imply. Although it is relevant for sober experience, so perhaps more relevant than a newcomer may think. However I've also known some miserable SOBs who've been sober for years. It seems second only to AA meeting attendance for the AA-ego-stakes. We don't so often see people talk about how many Steps they've taken, even though this is a much more relevant barometer to recovery.

And then, of course, there's the BS element. Only the other day I was sitting in a meeting where someone was telling the meeting how he's been sober for 9 years. He neglected to mention the fact he was "just coming back" from a pill-popping frenzy a year or two ago - some people really seem to believe that so long as they don't drink they can claim sobriety no matter what other chemically-induced escapism has been taking place.

PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 3:48 pm
by Denise
I found this very interesting and will no longer tell my sobriety date or my steps. I just got so excited about joining AA and being sober I never really thought about all of this. Thanks!

PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 4:02 pm
by Joe H
I give my sobriety date, Denise, because it is not about something I did but it is a gift to me and a celebration of AA working.

I am sober by the grace of God and the Fellowship of AA.

My sobriety date is April 12, 1996.

PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 9:26 pm
by ann2
Hi Denise,

One thing you will find in AA -- there is always a different way to do things right :-) -- and lots of people with different right ways.

Ann

PostPosted: Sat Aug 22, 2009 12:33 am
by Ken_the_Geordie
Hi, I've found this post interesting.

Can I just add that as a n00b to AA that when I first went into a meeting I thought AA was like doing a course. All you had to do was say attend for a couple of months, get sorted, and then leave and never drink for the rest of your life.

Honest.

I remember it coming as a bit of a shock when I found it was a life long programme (even though I didn't know what the programme was). But another shock was to find people in AA still regularly attending meetings after 20 years of sobriety. I thought these 'old gits' were just there to laugh at the new shaking and sweating people like me; but that's just an indication of the mental state of mind I had when I entered the rooms.

When I was new (and I know I'm still new) and in the grip of obsession, I looked for the guys/gals who were still relatively new themselves since I identified with them more.

As I say, I didn't trust the old timers; I just thought they were after a laugh at the newcommer's expense; which was very wrong; I can think of a few who're class guys now I've returned to some semblance of sanity and I now look towards them as almost a 'Father figure'.

Oh, and I understand most groups have got one; we've got a guy who when you hear his drinking history sounds like an alcoholic, has been sober for 30 years, yet never progressed past Step 3. I dislike it when he shares if there's a newcommer about, just in case the newcommer thinks he can do the same; I mean this guy has been sober for 30 years and seems a pleasant enough chap!

So, from my limited experience, I'm not sure if a sobriety date on a forum would be helpful or not. You've either lost the obsession with alcohol or you haven't! You either try to live the programme or you don't.

PostPosted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 4:13 pm
by leejosepho
I seldom mention my sobriety date unless asked, and if someone says anything like "Good job!" or "Congratulations!", I quickly let him or her know I get no credit for our Creator's handiwork. Time speaks for Him and for His "program", not for us former sufferers.

PostPosted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 8:55 pm
by samantha
Sorry, Leejosepho, I must have missed your introduction - you are new here, right? Can you please introduce yourself? This is the usual procedure here on the board.

Thanks
Sam