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A grudge thread

PostPosted: Fri Jun 05, 2015 3:25 pm
by sober_life
For example, I have a grudge with those who park their cars at the gas station in the reserved area for wheel chairs.

I feel like I want to say something, but these are younger and not exactly what I would say, "sober".

The other night I went in to get some late night snacks and sure enough, a black Mercedes sports car, young dude wearing black clothing, thick gold chain and that, "look at me" thing they do with their head turns. Ya know ?

I park next to him and gave that "quizical look" as if, "you are parked in a disabled car park zone" look. lol
He felt embarrassed but seemed to shrug it off.
He went into the store section and actually bought nothing that was urgent, I think he bought a car wash coupon.

It just annoys me and I feel like saying stuff I may regret, ( we are not saints) cos prayer and meditation for lost souls in disabled parking bays when they are not disabled themselves need to know that their ego don't fit where the sun shines !

Now that I vented my grudge, it's God's turn.

Re: A grudge thread

PostPosted: Fri Jun 05, 2015 10:56 pm
by ann2
We call it the If It Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else forum

viewforum.php?f=18

"Got an issue with someone or something? Want to whine a little?"

But I like grudge forum. That's more specific :)

My mother is in a wheelchair and she's very patient about driving around looking for enough room for her van's ramp to come down. I once saw a guy poke holes in the tires of a car that was parked in a reserved spot. This was in the North End of Boston and that's how they deal with grudges there.

I don't know about you but I often say things I regret. Might as well say them for a purpose.

Ann

Re: A grudge thread

PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2015 4:43 am
by Duke
I once had to back my friend's lift equipped van out after a movie, because someone in a small car had squeezed into the space on the side reserved for the lift.

She has printed cards she leaves on the windshields of offender's cars explaining life in a wheel chair. She's more charitable than me.

Like I often say, I wouldn't need a program if it was easy.

Re: A grudge thread

PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2015 5:50 am
by Brock
sober_life wrote:I feel like I want to say something, but these are younger and not exactly what I would say, "sober".


I liked this very much; I am in the latter part of my sixties and not nearly as strong as I used to be, but from time to time I have cause to point a finger at younger men and let them know that in my younger days they would not have gotten away with certain things.

In the past I have had cause to be concerned that our fellowship was encouraging people to be way too passive, it shows up when threads about things like cell phone use in meetings or just plain inconsiderate behavior by members and sometimes sponsors are discussed, I often wonder at some of the replies. So much of live and let live, or I must remember that MY definition of bad behavior is mine only I can’t judge others. I can only pray that those “men” don’t look at someone parked in the handicapped spot who is fit as a fiddle and walk away saying live and let live, without at least wishing they could do something about it, or better still do what sober_life did: give them the look.

And of equal importance for me would be to attempt to correct impolite behavior in as polite a manner as I can, not switch off that F- ing phone but perhaps a private and polite chat. We who know better have a duty to pass on decent manners to those who did not have the privilege to learn right from wrong, not my opinion of right from wrong, but what the majority of society deems decent behavior. I live in the Caribbean and it is somewhat third world, ladies coming on a beach here topless will be escorted off, men’s wear is decent bath trunks, some fellows beat up a man because he was wearing one of those thongs, some may disagree but it is what the majority of society in this part of the world deems right, when in Rome and so on. And when a car park has a handicap only sign or a meeting has a no cell phone sign then those are the rules, and three cheers to the men and women who seek to enforce them.

Re: A grudge thread

PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2015 1:38 pm
by positrac
Grudges or resentments in camouflage? I have a few grudges with social aspects in America and as to not get into other non AA related things I'll just bite my tongue. I can't change people, places or things as much as I'd like too....

:roll:

Re: A grudge thread

PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2015 2:14 pm
by ezdzit247
sober_life wrote:For example, I have a grudge with those who park their cars at the gas station in the reserved area for wheel chairs.

I feel like I want to say something, but these are younger and not exactly what I would say, "sober".

The other night I went in to get some late night snacks and sure enough, a black Mercedes sports car, young dude wearing black clothing, thick gold chain and that, "look at me" thing they do with their head turns. Ya know ?

I park next to him and gave that "quizical look" as if, "you are parked in a disabled car park zone" look. lol
He felt embarrassed but seemed to shrug it off.
He went into the store section and actually bought nothing that was urgent, I think he bought a car wash coupon.

It just annoys me and I feel like saying stuff I may regret, ( we are not saints) cos prayer and meditation for lost souls in disabled parking bays when they are not disabled themselves need to know that their ego don't fit where the sun shines !

Now that I vented my grudge, it's God's turn.


I like the idea of starting a grudge thread. We are not saints and all of us are subject to the human condition. Like one of my favorite old Cat Steven's song says: "...sometime ya have to moan when nothing seems to suit ya..." Also, my experience in recovery is that writing about pet peeves is even more therapeutic than talking about them because it gets me into that left brain-right brain interaction/involvement thing that me just talking about something can't.

So, yeah...go for it!

Keep coming back....

Re: A grudge thread

PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2015 5:33 pm
by sober_life
Also, my experience in recovery is that writing about pet peeves is even more therapeutic than talking about them because it gets me into that left brain-right brain interaction/involvement thing that me just talking about something can't.


Yeah my experience to, the writing and I felt the "disabled parking" issue is not something to just vent in my head, write it down in my book thing and pray about it. This is faith and action at work, public awareness and the spirit of the universe will get that message across somehow be it a TV commercial or whatever while "Mr/Sir Benzo Look at Me and my thick gold chain" may hear it and next time be a bit more courteous where he parks his motor vehicle.
I would not approach the person personally cos I'll just make matters worse, so let God of my understanding use me, through a forum.