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Posted: Fri Dec 19, 2003 8:01 pm
On behalf of everyone here at e-AA, please accept our sincere sympathy for your loss.
Our hearts go out to you in this time of sorrow.
May you find comfort in the knowledge that your husband is in a better place.
Feel free to keep in touch with us. If there is anything you'd like to talk about, we will be pleased to hear from you.
God bless you my dear friend,
Love & peace,
<small>[ 12-19-2003, 07:03 PM: Message edited by: Clark ]</small>
Posted: Sat Dec 20, 2003 7:42 am
Sorry for your loss GW. This month Dec. I my brother-in-law died from cancer. And I am coming up to 3 years that my son died from cancer.
Grief can be a painful thing to go through. But A.A. is here for me and it has helped me with my grief. Especially with my son's death. And with my brother-in-law's death.
When my son died I did a lot of talking with my sponsor and those talks helped. Also put a lot of alliance on my Higher Power.
Tools are availbable to us and I sure do use them in times of problems, grief, etc.
I am glad that you too are using the tools available to you.
Have a good day,
Posted: Sat Dec 20, 2003 6:31 pm
In case you aren't aware, we have a chatroom that is aways open.
You are welcome to come in anytime. There are usually other people there, if not, wait, someone will eventually come.
We have several AA meetings in the chatroom.
Check the schedule for times and dates.
At this time we're having an "Alkathon" with meetings every day throughout the Christmas & New Years season.
It would do you good to come to the chatroom. You will meet a wonderful group of caring AA's who will welcome you with open arms.
Hope to see you soon,
Love & peace,
<small>[ 12-21-2003, 02:17 PM: Message edited by: Clark ]</small>
Posted: Sun Dec 21, 2003 4:05 pm
I'm Len and I'm an acoholic too.
I would like to share with you. I have been sober quite a while too and I've had the experience of suffering a loss of the person I loved most in the world...my companion/dearest partner and friend died.
There was no warning, he was literally "taken" by thieves in the night. I was in a state of complete loss, shock and confusion. Jose's death was "unthinkable" to me or anyone else that knew him.
I sent for my sponsor the moment I heard the terrible news. My sponsor came over immediately and stayed with me for a few hours. I attended the funeral (the next day as they bury people quickly in Guatemala where we lived) in a daze. I went to the Central Cemetary in a daze.
I was surrounded by loving friends (both in and out of AA). I stayed in the "now" throughout all of the following days.
I prepared "our" annual Thanksgiving dinner about a week after the funeral (which coincided with his would have been 35th birthday too) and invited all the same crowd of wonderful friends that we always entertained on this "American" holiday.
That Thanksgiving was dedicated to the fine friendship that we all had with a brilliant Guatemalan-American man named Jose...we all took time and "shared" how much we had to be "thankful" for because we had been loved by Jose.
I abandoned myself to my God as I understood God...I stayed in the "now" every minute of everyday...I did what was in front of me like I heard always at AA meetings. I had "normal" grief and it took me a long time to go through the process of healing from the loss...but I did.
I stayed close to my AA meetings and I did what I knew to do...I picked up the phone, I talked to my sponsor, I shared at meetings, I did what was in front of me and I NEVER prentended that I felt differently than I did...I always turned myself over to my Higher Power and prayed for "Gods will for me and the power to carry it out."
I accepted "life on life's terms" and accepted my life exactly as it had come to be without Jose.
I feel blessed that I didn't drink or drug or hide from the pain...I'm still sober and the day I lost him was a little over six years ago now.
I don't run anymore from good or from "bad"...I stay where life takes me each day and I'm sober one-day-at-a-time.
I send you my love and my wish for your comfort as these "healing" days unfold for you in your sober life.
<small>[ 12-21-2003, 03:08 PM: Message edited by: Leonard(o), Puerto Rico ]</small>