Feeling like crap

Got an issue with someone or something? Want to whine a little? Here's the place to do it, or to get to know folks, or ask those questions that don't fit anywhere else.

Feeling like crap

Postby Noels » Sat Sep 23, 2017 8:23 pm

Good morning beautiful people. It's 5.25 here. I've had 2 hours sleep which have become 'usual ' for me this year. Being Sunday I can at least go back to bed a bit later to try and get another 2 before getting up to start the day.
I'm really tired and despondent right now.
I've been going through a very unnatural experience since beginning March this year involving AA members - both from f2f group and an online forum and reaching out for help and investigations have fallen on deaf ears and gotten me nowhere so far.
This experience have made me bitter against the AA I love so much to the extent that I haven't been attending f2f meetings and actually feel that I don't want AA in my life at all. This is extremely sad since there are so many suffering out there who desperately need to hear the goodness of our 12 step message.
Can anyone please give me details on who to contact at AA to share my story with them regarding an online group AND f2f groups who need to be checked out?
Much appreciated and looking forward to receiving some useful information.
Noels
There is only Love
Noels
Forums Old Timer
 
Posts: 1247
Joined: Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:14 am

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Chelle » Sat Sep 23, 2017 8:52 pm

Hi Noels,
I too started feeling disconnected and resentful at AA about a year ago. I fed that resentment until I eventually said screw it and I drank. I'm not saying this could happen to you, but it did with me. It took a great big bender and alot of blaming other people. I went back to AA and reworked the steps.I found out it wasn't them, it was me. I was running the show, telling them they were wrong, looking at the differences. Restless, irritable and discontent.

I say this lovingly..and you asked for advice..so have you considered going back to face to face meetings and signing up for a service position? It helped me alot. I wasn't running around trying to save or fix them all. I was just being helpful and God brought them to me, when He felt my house was in order.

I don't have any advice about who to complain to. I find that if one person disturbs me, that's one thing, but when many people and things disturb me, it's probably me. I was fighting everything and everyone, and miserable.

Today I try to make a box around myself as far as my arms will go, and remind myself..this is what chelles responsibility is. Thus area right here, and help out when I can.

I hope you get some rest and feel better soon.
User avatar
Chelle
Forums Contributor
 
Posts: 208
Joined: Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:12 am
Location: Midwest US

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Blue Moon » Sat Sep 23, 2017 9:45 pm

Noels wrote:Can anyone please give me details on who to contact at AA to share my story with them regarding an online group AND f2f groups who need to be checked out?

Within AA, there's nobody to contact except the group, unless you believe these groups need to be checked out for breaking Tradition 6 (lending AA's name to an outside entity). Otherwise, GSO etc. will just highlight to you Tradition 4, which states that all AA Groups are autonomous. I know there's the caveat "except in matters affecting other groups or AA as a whole", but for that they'll advise you to talk to the group(s) yourself.

Outside AA, if you have evidence that there's some criminal conduct going on, you could contact your local law-enforcement. That would not be an AA matter, even if criminal behaviour originated from someone in AA.

But as Chelle suggested, I would look in the mirror first. If groups (plural) or people (plural) seem to be a problem, this usually indicates that groups / people aren't really the problem. If you're only getting 2 hours' sleep at night, I suggest a sleep-study. Back in May/June, I went a couple of weeks getting just 3 or 4 hours a night. After 2 weeks, I was going crazy, and I hurt a good friendship. I needed to take specific steps to address the problem. After getting better sleep, the crazy fixed itself.
Ian S
AKA Blue Moon
User avatar
Blue Moon
Site Admin
 
Posts: 3564
Joined: Wed Jan 23, 2002 2:01 am
Location: New Jersey

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Noels » Sun Sep 24, 2017 12:26 am

WOW! Another slap in the cajoonies. .... That's unfortunate. Seems I'll have to go the media route after all. Thanks Blue.
Noels
There is only Love
Noels
Forums Old Timer
 
Posts: 1247
Joined: Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:14 am

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Noels » Sun Sep 24, 2017 12:32 am

Thanks for the advice Chelle but I seem to think I asked for useful information. If I haven't picked up a drink or built resentment against the actual people who have been involved WITHOUT going to regular meetings for the past 7 months I doubt I'll pick up a drink at 22 months sober. Thanks but no thanks. Perhaps you should meet my HP?
Have an awesome day and thanks anyway :D
Noels
There is only Love
Noels
Forums Old Timer
 
Posts: 1247
Joined: Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:14 am

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby clouds » Sun Sep 24, 2017 7:46 am

My first sponsor gave me the advice to go to three meetings a week for the first 5 years.
I have no idea why she said that.
I did do that and I have stayed sober a long long time, so my best advice to you Noels is:

get to 3 AA meetins a week for the first 5 years, then you could slack off to one or two a week if you want.

:D
" Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house." page 98 A.A.
User avatar
clouds
Trusted Servant
 
Posts: 1065
Joined: Mon Mar 23, 2015 11:45 am
Location: España

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Noels » Sun Sep 24, 2017 9:47 am

:lol: thanks Clouds but I think I'll pass :lol:
Noels
There is only Love
Noels
Forums Old Timer
 
Posts: 1247
Joined: Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:14 am

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Noels » Mon Sep 25, 2017 7:30 am

Aahhh. ... I just read my initial post again. Yes. Thats all true what I posted but if the people who I've been asking for assistance all along have actually bothered to assist me it would not have gone this far. Nope. Can't say it was you. But I'm not in a bad space at all. I'm actually pretty good having made the decisions I have. It's usually the 'in between period ' that have me down. The indecisive period but once I've made up my mind I just keep moving forward.
So my apologies if you were affected negatively by my post. What you are referring to happened right in the middle of my hardships and a post of yours online saying I was accusing the wrong person made me feel you knew who was involved AND was making fun of my pain at the same time.
But no... no resentment against you whatsoever.
Thanks for letting me know so we could clarify the issue :D
Noels
There is only Love
Noels
Forums Old Timer
 
Posts: 1247
Joined: Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:14 am

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby clouds » Mon Sep 25, 2017 8:24 am

Noels wrote::lol: thanks Clouds but I think I'll pass :lol:
Noels


Sure, no problem.

I share what works and worked for me.

We are all free. 8)
" Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house." page 98 A.A.
User avatar
clouds
Trusted Servant
 
Posts: 1065
Joined: Mon Mar 23, 2015 11:45 am
Location: España

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby PaigeB » Mon Sep 25, 2017 11:01 am

I'm actually pretty good having made the decisions I have. It's usually the 'in between period ' that have me down. The indecisive period but once I've made up my mind I just keep moving forward.

I have found that period of indecision hard too!

"As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action." page 87 talks about it!
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
User avatar
PaigeB
Trusted Servant
 
Posts: 10397
Joined: Fri Jun 24, 2011 12:28 pm
Location: Iowa USA

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Noels » Mon Sep 25, 2017 12:15 pm

Thanks Paige :D you don't seem to know the word pause :D from your shares I can see you exceptionally active. :D you really should give me some tips on how you manage to maintain your energy levels, a household, family AND still keep your hubby happy with all the action you have going at AA. THAT would be really helpful since I don't particularly enjoy reading :D
Thanks for your input though :D
Noels
There is only Love
Noels
Forums Old Timer
 
Posts: 1247
Joined: Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:14 am

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Chelle » Mon Sep 25, 2017 2:03 pm

Noels wrote:Thanks for the advice Chelle but I seem to think I asked for useful information.

You are welcome Noels. I'm sorry you did not find it useful.
I Hope you find the answers you are looking for.
User avatar
Chelle
Forums Contributor
 
Posts: 208
Joined: Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:12 am
Location: Midwest US

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby PaigeB » Mon Sep 25, 2017 3:33 pm

Noels wrote:Thanks Paige :D you don't seem to know the word pause :D from your shares I can see you exceptionally active. :D you really should give me some tips on how you manage to maintain your energy levels, a household, family AND still keep your hubby happy with all the action you have going at AA. THAT would be really helpful since I don't particularly enjoy reading :D
Thanks for your input though :D
Noels

I just Pause - I don't stop. I never know where the opportunities to stay busy or stay idle are God's will. As a puny human I can only hope that my willingness and then effort will be pleasing to the powers that be. Today I did not have to go to Walmart but it was not too far out of my way to take a friend there. I decided to go in and use the restroom and as I entered a gal was leaving in a rush... I said "Oh honey ~ you have some paper stuck to your shoe..." :oops:

Did I avert the apocalypse? Probably not, but maybe I helped that frazzled gal have a laugh (in private) and maybe a better day. Just doing what is in front of me.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
User avatar
PaigeB
Trusted Servant
 
Posts: 10397
Joined: Fri Jun 24, 2011 12:28 pm
Location: Iowa USA

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby Noels » Mon Sep 25, 2017 5:33 pm

I'll pray for you Paige. I don't think my HP would find the story funny at all. Perhaps it's time you meet Him?
Noels
There is only Love
Noels
Forums Old Timer
 
Posts: 1247
Joined: Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:14 am

Re: Feeling like crap

Postby PaigeB » Tue Sep 26, 2017 8:53 am

Thank Noel. Prayers are always appreciated.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
User avatar
PaigeB
Trusted Servant
 
Posts: 10397
Joined: Fri Jun 24, 2011 12:28 pm
Location: Iowa USA

Next

Return to If It Doesn't Fit Anywhere Else

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests