A Scandolous Men's Meeting

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A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby abhorsen » Sun Jan 08, 2017 10:07 pm

I recently attended a Men's meeting where the group openly berates and ridicules other members as the readings are being done. Phrases like “Hurry up faggot,” “Get that dick out of your mouth,” and many other humiliating profanities were shouted. In fact another women's AA meeting in the facility can here what’s happening in the meeting. It was held at a treatment center and resident newcomers were being verbally hazed as they were the ones primarily doing the readings. Is this acceptable to AA as organization. Am I missing some kind of big spiritual picture in feeling that this meeting is completely out of line the principles and traditions of the AA program? The meeting was listed in the AA directory.
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby positrac » Mon Jan 09, 2017 3:56 am

If you question if something is alarmingly wrong then I would suspect it is a bit outta hand.

So is this a treatment center? I am not condoning this activity as the world has drastically changed from my early days of sobriety. It seems today the more vulgar you are then the funnier it is. If this is a treatment center meeting I would consider that these people are not well and that they are acting out against the rules of the facility and denial they have a problem. Management either doesn't care as they count the money and or not into really fixing peoples destructive ways with addictions.
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby avaneesh912 » Mon Jan 09, 2017 6:46 am

This is definitely that needs to be brought up with the central office. No way its acceptable. It impacts AA as a whole.
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby Lali » Mon Jan 09, 2017 12:28 pm

Absolutely unacceptable. This has to be stopped. Report the behavior. Bring it up at the next group conscience meeting. In the meantime, get together with a couple of other people and take him aside for a stern talk.
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby ezdzit247 » Mon Jan 09, 2017 4:28 pm

Hi abhorsen

Thanks for sharing.

From what you've described, it sounds like this particular group's meeting is organized along the philosophical lines of Charles Dederich's old Synanon cult (hazing and humiliation, etc.) and not according to AA's philosophy or 12 Traditions. Because this is going on at a treatment facility, I would assume AA's GSO would consider it an outside issue, but your local AA intergroup committee should be informed of what's happening at their next monthly meeting so they can act to delete the meeting from the local AA meeting directory asap. That said, AA in general has had ongoing problems with AA gurus and their cult teachings & followers from the time AA began to the present. These cults usually have a short shelf life so they really haven't caused any permanent damage to the AA "brand" but they can harm unsuspecting individual newcomers who have no idea what goes on at real AA meetings or what the real AA program is about.
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby Blue Moon » Mon Jan 09, 2017 9:02 pm

abhorsen wrote:It was held at a treatment center .... The meeting was listed in the AA directory.


If it's a treatment-centre meeting, it should not be in the AA directory. This can easily happen because anyone can get a meeting listed in the directory without it being vetted, and it will stay in the directory until someone points out that it shouldn't be.

If it's an AA Group which just happens to meet at a treatment centre, any AA member could raise the matter with the Group's Conscience (or at the local District / Intergroup, e.g. if it's just a meeting with no group).
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby positrac » Tue Jan 10, 2017 3:28 am

positrac wrote:If you question if something is alarmingly wrong then I would suspect it is a bit outta hand.

So is this a treatment center? I am not condoning this activity as the world has drastically changed from my early days of sobriety. It seems today the more vulgar you are then the funnier it is. If this is a treatment center meeting I would consider that these people are not well and that they are acting out against the rules of the facility and denial they have a problem. Management either doesn't care as they count the money and or not into really fixing peoples destructive ways with addictions.



The attitude of the management is the issue and in these centers as people have to live close and so the picking on and making jokes, and being "funny" is the theme to shadow reality. This is not unique and yet it is out of control and keeping in mind we don't know the whole story and or events. I am not condoning this activity as it is wrong, although while I was in the service and I attended meetings on the ship we would give each other shitz at different times because we knew each other and it was close quarters. If a guest joined us we sure acted different I can say that as we did have respect back in those days.
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby Noels » Tue Jan 10, 2017 7:49 am

I can understand this actually although I don't need to agree with it. If you think about it - what gets an alcoholic (or normal people's) back immediately? Being told what to do and feeling less-than. What is one of our biggest defects? Inability to humility. So by doing what they're doing these "inmates :) " is probably trying to help that suffering alcoholic to get to the root of the problem quicker? Apart from that, they were probably taught to do that. Who knows?

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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby abhorsen » Tue Jan 10, 2017 2:18 pm

To clarify this is an AA meeting listed in the local area directory that takes place in a treatment center. I think I may go back and speak with the meeting sectratary to get a better understanding of the nature of the meeting. If this meeting wasn't in a treatment center I honestly would not care so much. If residents in treatment are forced to go this meeting then I'll pursue the issue further. Thanks for everyones replies.
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby michmjon » Mon Feb 13, 2017 6:37 am

See the "Deplorables" thread under this same section. I started the thread some weeks ago- it's about exactly what you are experiencing. Lots of good comments in there.
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Re: A Scandolous Men's Meeting

Postby Doddering Moron » Fri Sep 29, 2017 6:19 pm

Again, these Alano Clubs must be airtight echochambers where recovery, and only recovery is seen and heard. Otherwise, they'll be closed.
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