If you're not an alcoholic but have questions about AA, here's the place to ask them. Anyone may post messages and replies in this forum.
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Post by lolululaladidah »

hi guys, my name's Sophie, i'm 20 and I'm trying to make my mum see sense, she's been an alcoholic for thirty years and hasn't got any help. I wrote her this letter, can i have opinions please?
Hi Mum
I couldn't say these things to you in chesterfield because i was worried my anger might get the better of me and i've always tried to be the kind of person who doesn't let that happen.
I'm angry at you and you think you know why but you don't know the whole reason.
When you started drinking again in 2009 it broke me,you were the person i felt closest too and i couldn't shake this feeling that you'd let me down and not only that but it was my fault, i'd done something wrong. I felt like you thought our life wasn't good enough and that i'd been a part of that.
All i wanted to do is be there for you, i tried my hardest to make you happy but it didn't matter to you, all you cared about was drinking. It didn't seem to matter to you that your whole family was crying out to you to get better, that dad was barely home or that i'd lost a stone and was 7 1/2 stone.
You couldn't see the pain you were causing the people who love you because if you could you would've sorted yourself out and begged our forgiveness.
But none of this mattered when you were sober because you were my mum, my wonderful mummy and that was all i cared about.
But then three years ago you stopped drinking and you weren't you anymore. It was like a part of you died and i still don't feel like you're you even now. You lost our energy. it was like a light had gone out in you.
I feel like i've been without a mum for three years and i miss you, the old you. You left me, you went away and you haven't come back yet. I want my mum, my mummy back and if you don't get help, proper emotional help that won't happen. I love you more than anything but that won't last forever because it hurts and you're losing friends fast. But you still have a chance to change this and you NEED to take it because it could be your last.
Stop hurting yourself because when you hurt yourself it hurts us and that's not fair.
Please listen to me
Sophie xxx

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Re: Intervention

Post by becksdad »

Sophie, thank you for posting. Your letter touched me, as I have a daughter a few years older than you, and she lived through my alcoholism, too. I do not know if the letter you wrote to your Mum will help her or not, but I suspect it may be the beginning of helping you. I encourage you to contact a group called Alanon, made up of family and friends of alcoholics. Like AA, they are a group of people who share a common problem and common recovery, and come together to support each other in pursuit of recovery for themselves. Alcoholism is truly a family disease, and should one person begin to get better, it cannot help but to make the entire family situation better. Seek help for yourself in dealing with this, and your Mum may possibly come that much quicker to a willingness to recover herself. Whether or not she does, you can certainly get better.

You can find Alanon in your locality by searching online for "Alanon (your city/town)". God bless and all the best to you and your family.


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