Homegroup- restrictions?

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Homegroup- restrictions?

Postby MarlaB » Sun Jun 28, 2015 4:58 pm

Hi everyone I am new to AA been sober 3 months. My sponsor told me I needed to pick a home group but all the meetings I liked attending are service meetings and according to her they could not be a home group. Has anyone else heard of this? Please advise. Thank you!
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Re: Homegroup- restrictions?

Postby kenyal » Sun Jun 28, 2015 6:49 pm

Welcome here Marla. I've not heard of restrictions or qualifications for considering a meeting your homegroup. That would be new to me.

Obviously the qualities of some meetings lend themselves to that better than others. A meeting where the faces change each week, or where there are few people with time participating, or meetings that have lost their focus and carry a weak message would be poor choices, imo. A place where you can get to know people and watch what happens to them over time, where there is a healthy influx of new people, where bonds develop that often extend beyond AA, and where there is regular talk of our solution would be qualities I'd look for.

If the talk in the service meetings is that service is all that members need in order to recover, I'd continue looking for better.
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Re: Homegroup- restrictions?

Postby Tommy-S » Mon Jun 29, 2015 4:50 pm

Hi Marla & Welcome to e-AA.

I have to say that you are the first I've heard of who wanted to make a Service Meeting their homegroup :)

We have no rules in AA, and none of us are forced to stay with a sponsor, or even get one to begin with. But I'm in agreement with your sponsor on this as our AA pamphlet, "The AA Group...Where it all begins" (http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-16_theaagroup.pdf ) talks about The AA Home Group on page 15.

The home group was where I first got into 'AA service"...helping set up the coffee, chairs, etc, and then cleaning up afterwards. It gave me time to hang around some of the other members, getting to know them and letting them know me. In time, I made friends (and found out my home group people liked me just as screwed up as I was). Even better, I discovered they 'wanted' to help me get well as it helped them. They allowed me to be me, and encouraged me when I was struggling. They became my 'extended family'

It's been several 24 hours since I started this journey, and I still have a home group... It's an important part of my continued growth in sobriety, and like your sponsor, I wouldn't what you to miss what we found.

Give it a shot, let some group help you find what we found :)

Thanks... Tommy
Together, we don't have to cave in or wimp out to that Fatal First One, no matter what today!
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Re: Homegroup- restrictions?

Postby positrac » Tue Jun 30, 2015 4:03 am

I would advise this one point and it is something we may take for granted: Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities. 12&12 Tradition Twelve, p.184

Just because we get sober doesn't mean we are totally cured of some of our past character defects. So find a meeting that will allow you to grow and that will embrace you and you'll see good things.
You must live your life from beginning to end: No one else can do it for you.
Hopi Proverb
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Re: Homegroup- restrictions?

Postby aaforever » Wed Sep 16, 2015 1:53 pm

I personally picked a 'home group' with a convenient location and the meetings run as late as midnight, but to me home group is the group that you are constantly attending.
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