Fairly new to sponsorship...

Most of us who recovered with AA's program did so with the help of a "sponsor". But what is sponsorship? How do I get one? Who can be a sponsor? What makes a good sponsor?

Fairly new to sponsorship...

Postby suzyq1952 » Sat Feb 25, 2017 9:10 am

I use the tenants of sponsoring as I have been taught from my sponsor. When sponsoring a new sponsee I request they call me once a day for the first 30 days or our relationship. The purpose of this "request" is to keep them in close contact with me, to show their "willingness". I have a new sponsee that does not attend the same Homegroup as myself therefore I don't get to see her at the meetings I normally attend so that only "daily-early" contact is per phone. I have also indicated that if her day gets too busy, she may text me...I'm not a Nazi sponsor...
However...is this "my" problem? I'm I trying to control her (which I know I can't)...if she's sober...contacting me in time to set up our next Step Work Meeting and show's up when we agree on a date and time...should I let the rest go?
I need some one to set ME straight on this. My sponsor is a bit wishy-washy on this matter so just give it to me straight...I'm a big girl...
Thanks for any advice/suggestions...
...just a bit frustrated right now on a really stupid little issue in my life...?just pray about I?
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Re: Fairly new to sponsorship...

Postby Noels » Sat Feb 25, 2017 9:45 am

Hi Suzy :D I cant see anything wrong with it. Everyone have their own way of working with their sponsees and if that is your way and they are prepared to do it, no problem.
Mwah xxx Noels
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Re: Fairly new to sponsorship...

Postby Spirit Flower » Sat Feb 25, 2017 9:52 am

Here is a panphlet on sponsorship:
http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/aa-liter ... ponsorship

I had a "call me every day sponsor" my first year. I enjoyed the calls. But it wouldn't have worked forever of course. She got me through the steps and punted me out the door.
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Re: Fairly new to sponsorship...

Postby PaigeB » Sat Feb 25, 2017 11:28 am

I have one weekly call time and one weekly meeting to work through the book. This is a new sponsor for me and I am excited about getting a new experience! I set my call time into a weekly alarm so I remember to call. I am encouraged to call other women in my circle, women from my home group or my sponsorship tree.

My first sponsor had no call time, just a weekly meet up to read & work the Steps. I stayed sober too!

So I think the relationship will work into whatever routine it works into. Call or text daily is a little much for me I think, but I would probably do it for 30 days... or finally get into a routine of doing it by the time the 30 days was up! lol.

I let my relationships blossom - I don't insist on compliance of any kind, just suggestions. Except the meet time, I am too busy to play no call no show. But I don't "fire" sponsees, I look for solutions with them and work out the relationship. If it really doesn't work then maybe they need another sponsor. If they get drunk several times, they might want to look for a new sponsor and a new experience.

My sponsor asked me, "Do you think you can help her?" If the answer is "yes" then I have to attempt to work it out. Sponsees are my lessons in life as well as my opportunities to pass on was what given to me.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
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Re: Fairly new to sponsorship...

Postby Reborn » Sat Feb 25, 2017 12:39 pm

My sponsorship responsibilities are to take someone through the the steps...not tell someone what to do...most of my "advice" goes something like this..."this is my experience with 'xyz'...this is what I did...and this is the result I got." As far as my sponsees calling everyday...I never say they have to...rather I tell them I am available for them anytime. My goal is for them to tap that inner resource not to fix them persaonally...that is impossible.
We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others. BB pg 132
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Re: Fairly new to sponsorship...

Postby Blue Moon » Sun Mar 05, 2017 9:47 pm

Not sure I understand the problem, but ...

suzyq1952 wrote:When sponsoring a new sponsee I request they call me once a day for the first 30 days or our relationship. The purpose of this "request" is to keep them in close contact with me, to show their "willingness".


So what happens when (not if) they don't call according to your schedule?

...if she's sober...


If she's sober, she should carry on doing what she's doing (and hopefully moving in a direction where she can stay sober for the long haul). If not, she needs to change something that she's doing. Either way, what she does is up to her.

As a sponsor, I'm a guide. I can guide you from A to B via C. If you want to go from A to W, or from A to B via X, I cannot help you. If you get there anyway, that's cool, it's just without my help as I only know the route from A to B via C.
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Re: Fairly new to sponsorship...

Postby Roberth » Mon Mar 13, 2017 11:58 am

Noels wrote: I cant see anything wrong with it. Everyone have their own way of working with their sponsees and if that is your way and they are prepared to do it, no problem.

and every sponsee is different as well.
I had one sponsee who thought the traditions were a waste a time. So I ask him to do me favor to go through them and find me the Loop holes. All I told him when came at me with a list of loop holes was "You can try following them now that you know what they say."
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Re: Fairly new to sponsorship...

Postby Noels » Mon Mar 13, 2017 2:37 pm

:D :D :D excellent thanks Robert. I'll remember that one :D :D :D
mwah xxx
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