What an idea. A dry drunk in need of help

Most of us who recovered with AA's program did so with the help of a "sponsor". But what is sponsorship? How do I get one? Who can be a sponsor? What makes a good sponsor?

What an idea. A dry drunk in need of help

Postby adsmith8604 » Mon Apr 25, 2016 7:34 pm

Well just what I was looking for. I need guidance, not a newcomer but a dry drunk you may say. 3 years sober but have never got serious with a sponsor. I need a temporary sponsor, someone to help me work up courage, strength to do this. To make a go at this. I freeze. I don't talk enough. I need help! Pm me with replies pls, not sure I'm notificKtions get sent to my email I hope they do they. New to this but very interested thanks
Oh I'm Andrew and I'm an alcoholic by the way
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Re: What an idea. A dry drunk in need of help

Postby DGPS » Sat May 07, 2016 4:24 pm

I hope you found some kindness out there. Isn't always easy to find.
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Re: What an idea. A dry drunk in need of help

Postby Larryp713 » Tue May 10, 2016 9:23 am

Hi Andrew and welcome. It is a very good thing that you are wanting to work the steps. Do you attend f2f meetings regularly? I am not sure how effective online sponsorship is, but I do think there is value in working with somebody you can see every once in awhile. That might be hard for people who live in sparsely populated areas.
Trudging the Road of Happy Destiny!!!
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Re: What an idea. A dry drunk in need of help

Postby positrac » Wed May 11, 2016 2:38 am

adsmith8604 wrote:Well just what I was looking for. I need guidance, not a newcomer but a dry drunk you may say. 3 years sober but have never got serious with a sponsor. I need a temporary sponsor, someone to help me work up courage, strength to do this. To make a go at this. I freeze. I don't talk enough. I need help! Pm me with replies pls, not sure I'm notificKtions get sent to my email I hope they do they. New to this but very interested thanks
Oh I'm Andrew and I'm an alcoholic by the way

Welcome to the site first off.
I do have to ask why would doing this online be any better, and or you'd find success that you haven't found in 3 years? I ask because I know me and if I can hide behind anything I will! I am a drunk and I know how to play the system to get what I want and or think I want.

I believe the online access is helpful, doesn't hold anyone to accountability and so we know what you want us to know because we can't physically see you when you are in your worst form. Body language has a way of finking on us and calling us out when in the rooms. Being a dry drunk is no way to live and I have some experience with this back twenty odd years ago and I held on from getting drunk because of fear. I had to break that cycle by reaching out and laying my cards out and getting honest with me.

You know getting our drink on we found a lot of courage and strength to live in a fog and once sober it is different. Maybe going into a new meeting and or old meeting and reaching out and introducing yourself is huge for starters. Our sobriety is a life or death deal and if I expect to be enabled then I could be setting myself up for failure. After 3 years something has to have sunk in about AA and the lifestyle and I believe that you are the key to inner success and you should do your part. In all honesty I could never temp sponsor someone online living where ever unless they were local to me as I'd want to see them regularly.

Support is only as good as the information received and I am far from perfect and or got it all tied up in one sock. Don't take it personal because we are all drunks and we all have our issues and moments and so we are about support.
You must live your life from beginning to end: No one else can do it for you.
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Re: What an idea. A dry drunk in need of help

Postby odat12 » Wed Oct 18, 2017 3:29 am

Hi Andrew and welcome.

I'm a newcomer to AA and tried the dry drunk many times only to land myself back into drinking over and over again. And agreeing much with what's already been said, being a drunk I know too well how to play the system. I come online for meetings and know this would not be enough for me. As for face to face meetings, when I finally started to go 3 weeks ago, I was very comforted by the fact that no one was trying to make me talk or share or do anything I didn't want to do or say. I sit and listen and finally started sharing a bit at last night's meeting. I love this meeting because there are no obligations. The people are very welcoming and have a lot of wisdom. I suffer from high anxiety and sometimes suffer panic attacks when confronted with speaking to people, one on one or in groups. I tell you from my own experience that although I get lots of golden nuggets from these forums and online meetings, this is 10-fold with Face to Face meetings. I pray you find the courage to face your fear because I really think you'd find peace if you went. Best of luck.
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