Take what you need and leave the rest?

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Westiemom
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Re: Take what you need and leave the rest?

Post by Westiemom » Sat Feb 02, 2019 2:58 pm

Thank you everyone! I’m so glad I posted here. You have given me a lot to think about!

Vlopez1227
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Re: Take what you need and leave the rest?

Post by Vlopez1227 » Sun Mar 24, 2019 4:46 pm

I’m really scared of trying to be sober but I think I am ready for a change I know what life is like drunk I would like to know what life sober would be. I have been drinking drinking for over 20 years and I’m only 41. My whole family are alcoholics and drug addicts . It see,s life seems to be a trigger for me would really like to learn how to live life on life’s terms

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PaigeB
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Re: Take what you need and leave the rest?

Post by PaigeB » Mon Mar 25, 2019 11:32 am

AA can help with that! It is "a way of living that works in rough going" and much much more!
Step 6 is "AA's way of stating, the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime job... with most of them we shall have to be content with patient improvement." 12&12 Step Six, p.65

shaunagus
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Re: Take what you need and leave the rest?

Post by shaunagus » Fri Apr 19, 2019 2:22 am

In terms of step 3 and turning our will and our life over at that point. I always used to think that meant that I needed to have a belief in god,or god-like, or spiritual being or whatever at that point but eventually came to see that for me step three was just about making a decision to work the steps. I am an atheist, in fact organised religion was on my step four resentment inventory because I loathed it seeing it as a system of oppression and control etc etc.

So I looked at it like this: there were people in AA who had worked the steps and had got well, stopped drinking but more than that were happy, the desire to drink had left them, they smiled and laughed a lot, they seemed well people. So I made the decision to work the steps in the belief that they would work for me in the same way and have the same effect. So my “faith” if you like was that the steps were a power greater than I was and I was making a decision to turn my will over to working the steps, the programme.

Now, as it happens, after taking inventory, sharing inventory and at that point wanting to have my defects removed (wanting to be different), starting to make my amends etc I didhave a spiritual awakening. I don’t become religious. I’m still an atheist (not a theist) but nonetheless I had a spiritual awakening.

My understanding of the programme is that the spiritual awakening comes afterworking the steps (“having had a spiritual awakening as a result of of these steps”) whereas I think a lot of people see step 3 and think “ok, before I go any further I’ve got to get this god thing sorted.
“I am a seeker, a poor sinful creature, there is no weaker than I am,” Dolly Parton

D'oh
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Re: Take what you need and leave the rest?

Post by D'oh » Fri Apr 19, 2019 4:42 am

Looking back, I had a belief that the Group/Program was a Power Greater than Myself, they would and were willing to Restore me back to Sanity. At the very least, show me How.

That lead me to Step 3. Sure there was a lot of talk about a Power Greater than them, a God as They understood God. This was Great for them, if it worked, why not? But "Where was the Proof" the Flash of Light, the Silhouette?

So I proceeded to try to "Turn my will and Life over to the Group". But I couldn't understand How or What to do? Besides emptying Ash Trays and making Coffee. But I moved onto Step 4. That is where I got Stopped. I could not write much of anything.

I was somewhat on a Pity Pot, "Why Me" when my Grandma Passed, I came home from Detox, which I didn't understand being sober for abot months at the time. Only to find a House full of Drunks, including an Uncle who had sobered up a couple of months before me. The next thing that I realized was I was at a Meeting? Sharing the problem with my Then Higher Power. I Stayed Sober!

I even went back to finish Detox, 4 days 100 mile trip. But I had an more Opened Mind. I attended Meetings nightly at the other town. When at one Meeting "Old Joe" spoke. Joe basically said "You know everybody's Happy, Content faces at Meetings?" "That's not them, that is a Higher Power working through them." They are all just Messed Up Alcoholics."

There was My Proof, My Flash of Light. There is a Power even Higher than the Group. And it can be of "My Understanding" I didn't have to believe a TV Preacher's view, Bald People's at the Airports view, or the people who knock at the doors view. Juust "My Understanding."

Now, everything in Life happens for a reason, I might not understand them and may never understand it, but Trust that my HP has control, and be open for what he wants me to do to Help with His Will.

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