by gaftech » Sat Jan 06, 2018 3:40 am
Welcome Stuart,
In the words of Positrac, I made my first of 3 appearances in AA at the age of 26 back in 1986. I was in the Navy at the time and got busted, so I was ordered to a month-long rehab and 3 months of AA. By then I had been drinking since about 1972, heavily and consistently by the time I graduated high school in 1976. Got so bad that I lost my low end job and couldn't get another one so I joined the Navy. I lived up to the image of a drunken sailor quite nicely, thank you. I completed my "sentence" and managed to stay sober for two years, albeit without the aid of AA. I thought they were a bunch of whiners.
Busted again in 1996, same scenario as the first time, and started drinking again in 1998. I managed to retire from the Navy in 2000, but my drinking did nothing but escalate until October of last year, when I finally reached the decision on my own that I had a serious problem that needed to be dealt with. So I checked myself into detox for a week and hit the meetings every chance I got. I've been sober for 82 days now and have never felt better in my life. It's amazing what one can achieve with a clear mind! I just wish I had not been so bullheaded the first chance I had when I was 26.
My advice:
1. Live in the present and not in the past or the future. What's done is done and what's going to happen in the future is anyone's guess so there's no point in worrying about that. Be mindful of what's going on around you. Enjoy life in the here and now.
2. Listen to the thoughts in your head and learn to recognize when your mind is trying to get you to drink again. The mind can play pretty deviously with your sobriety, so the more you learn which thoughts are dangerous and which are benign, the better you're able to fend off the drinking thoughts and maintain your sobriety.
3. Attend different types of meetings (open, closed, big book, 12 step, etc.) and meetings in different locations. This will expose you to a lot of different people and their stories and will help you in deciding which group you'd like to make your Home Group. Having a home group, for me at least, is kind of like having an extended family. It's a place that becomes familiar and comfortable and allows me to make friendships that will in all likelihood, last a lifetime. That doesn't mean you have to stop going to other meetings. By all means do so, I do.
4. Lastly, keep coming back. The people in those meetings and those here on this forum are ready, able, and willing to assist you in whatever way we can. You are not alone.