Romantics of alcohol

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Romantics of alcohol

Postby highcostofliving » Sat Sep 23, 2017 4:33 pm

Someone in a meeting I went too almost 4 years ago now, once mentioned about how we romanticize alcohol. For some reason that has really stuck with me... and I'm so glad it has... as today, for some reason when the 'panic' of quitting sets in, my brain is sending me messages of a romantic nature of sorts - all the good times I'm giving up, laughter, bar nights, late heart to hearts after everyone else has left the party, the stories of our stupors... I start to feel this sense of loss when I think about quitting...

I'm so glad for that AA member I can't remember, for I feel like with that statement, I'm recognizing these thoughts for what they are... lies. The truth is, most of those good times ended poorly.. .being woken up by firemen, MIP's, fights, a broken neck, going through glass doors - I don't even remember that entire hospital visit, woke up on the couch with stitches across my entire face..it had taken a plastic surgeon - I have no recollection of ever being there... as I've obsessed over yet another daily issue, and while I was feeeling - self pity, maybe, for never having a beer at a Seahawks game again... or turning down my friends upcoming 40th birthday in Vegas (no way in hell am I ready to challenge Las Vegas)... I was just rocking an electric sander putting a new toybox together for my daughter and it sort of hit me.... I have never, ever, EVER woken up and told myself "man, I wish I drank last night"...... but more times than I can count have I woken up with the all too familiar... "I'm never drinking again... "

It's all a romanticized version my head has drawn up for me to continue drinking... I regret so many moments alcohol has given me, but when it comes to saying no to alcohol (the few times I have managed that) - I have never regretted NOT drinking.... Anyways, just sort of thinking out loud here, felt like sharing. Thanks for reading!
"The high cost of living, ain't nothin like the cost of living high" - Jamey Johnson
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby JohnDaniels » Sat Sep 23, 2017 11:45 pm

highcostofliving wrote:Someone in a meeting I went too almost 4 years ago now, once mentioned about how we romanticize alcohol. For some reason that has really stuck with me... and I'm so glad it has... as today, for some reason when the 'panic' of quitting sets in, my brain is sending me messages of a romantic nature of sorts - all the good times I'm giving up, laughter, bar nights, late heart to hearts after everyone else has left the party, the stories of our stupors... I start to feel this sense of loss when I think about quitting...

I'm so glad for that AA member I can't remember, for I feel like with that statement, I'm recognizing these thoughts for what they are... lies. The truth is, most of those good times ended poorly.. .being woken up by firemen, MIP's, fights, a broken neck, going through glass doors - I don't even remember that entire hospital visit, woke up on the couch with stitches across my entire face..it had taken a plastic surgeon - I have no recollection of ever being there... as I've obsessed over yet another daily issue, and while I was feeeling - self pity, maybe, for never having a beer at a Seahawks game again... or turning down my friends upcoming 40th birthday in Vegas (no way in hell am I ready to challenge Las Vegas)... I was just rocking an electric sander putting a new toybox together for my daughter and it sort of hit me.... I have never, ever, EVER woken up and told myself "man, I wish I drank last night"...... but more times than I can count have I woken up with the all too familiar... "I'm never drinking again... "

It's all a romanticized version my head has drawn up for me to continue drinking... I regret so many moments alcohol has given me, but when it comes to saying no to alcohol (the few times I have managed that) - I have never regretted NOT drinking.... Anyways, just sort of thinking out loud here, felt like sharing. Thanks for reading!


I enjoy reading your post here about the way you recognize these thoughts of romanticizing alcohol for what they are ... lies. And the way of what seemed like good times ended bad with paramedics coming after the fights. All the insanity.

You've had some painful times in your alcoholism. But conversely your wisdom and growth in AA 12 Step recovery are having a similar amount of power, only it is a positive and sane power.

Now, This is a cunning, baffling and powerful disease, so powerful it will try to tell us we don't have a disease. This is why getting into the 12 Steps, prayer and meditation and sticking with the winners are so important ... it keeps us away from that thinking that can turn into an obsession. I like the message you talk about in "The High Cost of Living Ain't Nothing Like the Cost of Living High" I can see that message and the recovery being carried in you as well.

I like your thoughts on "I have never, ever, EVER woken up and told myself "man, I wish I drank last night" That's great! Yeah, NOW who's the Joe Sobriety? You buddy. :lol:

One of my machinists asked me one time if I wanted to go to a bar with him after work. I said "No. If I wanted the results that you're going to have tomorrow morning I'd just smack myself in the forehead with a ball peen hammer, then go to bed. Then when I get up tomorrow I'd wake up with the same results as you. Only I'd look in my wallet and still have all my money.
Tomorrow morning you'll have that headache, you won't remember last night, so you'll have to look in your wallet to see how much money you spent. The less money you have in your wallet will let you know how much fun you had. If you're flat busted, you'll know you had a fun time."
:lol:
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby avaneesh912 » Sun Sep 24, 2017 4:23 am

I regret so many moments alcohol has given me, but when it comes to saying no to alcohol (the few times I have managed that) - I have never regretted NOT drinking....


Thats the peculiar mental twist that precedes our slipping back to the old ways. We always hear the statements think through the drink. Unfortunately without the realization that connecting to the power, the newcomer does not have the capacity to "think through". Thats true powerlessness.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby PaigeB » Sun Sep 24, 2017 12:12 pm

Euphoric recollection... Fantasy.

Our perception of drinking doesn't change until we have had a spiritual experience as a result of working the Steps. Even then, if we romanticize it, that same old skewed recollection of "the good old days" can return. For me, I have to remember that my perception is skewed and STOP thinking kind thoughts and remember the truth of the illness I have.

It wants me dead
It will settle for me drunk.
But first it has to get me alone.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby positrac » Mon Sep 25, 2017 3:02 am

I keep my last drunk handy as it was one heck of a night and maybe not as grandiose as yours. But I had a nasty black out and it did stick with me because of the pain physically and the remorse of not knowing what really happened. I can tell you that it took like 20 years to find some of the root causes of my last drunk and some of the decisions that might of been had a vote to fire me had happened. Talk about humble moments and it got me all teared up because of people taking a risk on me!

Good reminder of my past and present.
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby highcostofliving » Mon Sep 25, 2017 5:30 am

I agree with each and every response here.... I find it almost fascinating how this disease works... for me personally I have to 'force' myself to remember anything negative about my last night drinking... the information that reaches my mind first is all a puff piece of a good time... and that's not at all what happened. I'm basically on 'auto-lie' to myself. I think recognizing that and being armed with that realization is help..
"The high cost of living, ain't nothin like the cost of living high" - Jamey Johnson
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby Cristy99 » Fri Sep 29, 2017 1:29 pm

Highcostofliving wrote:
"I have never, ever, EVER woken up and told myself "man, I wish I drank last night"


WOW!!!

What a concept!!! How profound!!! Thanks for that!! This is one of the moments that happen to me once in a while where I have to physically close my mouth which is gaping open. =surprised :shock:

I like the way Positrac mentioned keeping the last really bad drunk handy. I do that too Posi!! And it's precisely for this reason...my mind drifting to the good times and keeping the bad times in the darkness to be forgotten. I choose to remember the horrible times and pain I caused in DETAIL!!! Not to beat myself up, but just for a really good defense against the first drink. Whatever works, right??? Love what Paige wrote too, if only I could remember.... :lol: Something about "it wants me dead, but will settle for drunk..."

Excellent post!! Thanks Highcost!!!!
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby Patsy© » Mon Oct 02, 2017 4:07 am

highcostofliving wrote:I agree with each and every response here.... I find it almost fascinating how this disease works... for me personally I have to 'force' myself to remember anything negative about my last night drinking... the information that reaches my mind first is all a puff piece of a good time... and that's not at all what happened. I'm basically on 'auto-lie' to myself. I think recognizing that and being armed with that realization is help..


Wow, that is so true! I had a built in forgetter, with the help of God, AA and the 12 steps....today, Thank God.. I can Remember When!


Page 24 in the Big Book: "The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink.

The almost certain consequences that follow taking even a glass of beer do not crowd into the mind to deter us. If these thoughts occur, they are hazy and readily supplanted with the old threadbare idea that this time we shall handle ourselves like other people. There is a complete failure of the kind of defense that keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove."
Failed 12 Step Call? Not if we walk away sober!
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby avaneesh912 » Mon Oct 02, 2017 5:30 am

I have read Bills story several times but recently I see how he paints his traits so nicely from the very start.

I was part of life at last, and in the midst of the excitement I discovered liquor. I forgot the strong warnings and the prejudices of my people concerning drink. In time we sailed for "Over There." I was very lonely and again turned to alcohol.

So, like all of us, he finds liquor midst of the excitement and goes back to it when he is lonely.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Romantics of alcohol

Postby WendyR » Mon Oct 02, 2017 10:37 am

highcostofliving wrote:I have never, ever, EVER woken up and told myself "man, I wish I drank last night"...... but more times than I can count have I woken up with the all too familiar... "I'm never drinking again... "
WOW! Isn't that the truth! What a powerful statement and good reason why you DON'T wish you drank last night.

JohnDaniels wrote:One of my machinists asked me one time if I wanted to go to a bar with him after work. I said "No. If I wanted the results that you're going to have tomorrow morning I'd just smack myself in the forehead with a ball peen hammer, then go to bed. Then when I get up tomorrow I'd wake up with the same results as you. Only I'd look in my wallet and still have all my money.
Tomorrow morning you'll have that headache, you won't remember last night, so you'll have to look in your wallet to see how much money you spent. The less money you have in your wallet will let you know how much fun you had. If you're flat busted, you'll know you had a fun time." :lol:


And yet another great and true statement. Statements like these really make you think about why you romanticize about alcohol in the first place. :lol:
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