My GF may be an alcoholic

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My GF may be an alcoholic

Postby nowayback » Tue Jun 27, 2017 8:45 am

So I am in a relationship for 3 months now. Since day one I thought she drank a lot, but its hot here, and a fun place to be. Since then I have seen her down whiskey straight like water, a bottle is not a problem. Mostly whiskey but also a greek drink about 85 proof and gin tonics which are never strong enough .She definitely drinks in morn, not always but often. She can go a few days w/o " I think" . On rare occasions I will have a drink but she coffee which surprises me. From what I understand she drinks for years. Her mom says so, and that she finds bottles hidden. Here behavior can be anything, not many people she hasn't argues with, at 1st I thought she is just high strung, But mom says otherwise. She does her work fine but has no problem to curse her boss, or anyone for that matter.KI never saw anyone drink so much water as her, although her blood tests from last year came back normal. Jealous like crazy. Only ever really calls her mom, not any friends unless she needs something. She is very caring and never loses her temper with our dogs. I guess I will only know her real character if she is off alcohol for years? Is there any doubt that she is an alcoholic? She has agreed to go to her 1st meeting .
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Re: My GF may be an alcoholic

Postby Brock » Tue Jun 27, 2017 3:23 pm

We do get inquiries like these from time to time, it is not really possible for us to say, if she may even be an alcoholic of the type AA is designed to assist, here is a section from our main text -
Then we have a certain type of hard drinker. He may have the habit badly enough to gradually impair him physically and mentally. It may cause him to die a few years before his time. If a sufficiently strong reason—ill health, falling in love, change of environment, or the warning of a doctor—becomes operative, this man can also stop or moderate, although he may find it difficult and troublesome and may even need medical attention. But what about the real alcoholic? He may start off as a moderate drinker; he may or may not become a continous hard drinker; but at some stage of his drinking career he begins to lose all control of his liquor consumption, once he starts to drink.
Here is the fellow who has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.1 He is seldom mildly intoxicated. He is always more or less insanely drunk. His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but little. He may be one of the finest fellows in the world. Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously anti-social. He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement kept. He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish.

It goes on like this, you may Google 'AA Big Book PDF' and read more on pages 20/21, the doctors opinion near the front might be of interest as well.
I guess I will only know her real character if she is off alcohol for years?

Not really, she has agreed to a first meeting good for her, but meetings vary one to another, and we can only hope she meets the sort of crowd she might relate to, you might encourage her to try a few before making up her mind. The first few days are most difficult, some people need medication to protect against the dangers associated with withdrawal, at least have some booze handy, and if necessary and she is very ill she should take a couple of shots. But once a person wants the solution the work can be done in a couple of months quite easily, and you will know her real character, mind you our character improves as we continue with the programs suggested spiritual path.

Well done caring about her enough to ask, and if she seems OK with the first meeting maybe suggest she join us here, there are many more suggestions like you tube AA speakers she can listen to, best of luck to you both.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: My GF may be an alcoholic

Postby avaneesh912 » Tue Jun 27, 2017 6:30 pm

I guess I will only know her real character if she is off alcohol for years?

Even if she does stay (somehow) off alcohol, if alcoholics don't change their perspective, they get real emotional about everything. It manifests itself in various forms in different people. Eventually, their emotions overwhelm them and they go back to drink.

I was watching HBO doc on Alcoholism. They show different set of people. The first one is a single women, you can watch it and get an idea how they go all happy and suddenly get emotional (this one is still drinking). And wake up and do the same thing again.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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