Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

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Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

Postby avaneesh912 » Fri Jun 02, 2017 8:24 am

I find it odd when people with long term sobriety share that they have to keep their memory green by visiting new-comers meetings and see the suffering of those who come in fresh. First of all this knowledge that they suffer is NOT going to keep them sober (Bills Story is there to illustrate that).

Just looking back my own crap, can easily give me a glimpse of the torture. I dont have to go to a meeting to know that. I go there to share that, yes, we were like that but, by working the 12 steps, we don't have to live in misery.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

Postby PaigeB » Fri Jun 02, 2017 10:48 am

For me it is not knowledge, but humility that I find at a beginner's meeting.
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Re: Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

Postby Brock » Fri Jun 02, 2017 11:50 am

I am certain that some people are more 'recovered' than others, and it doesn’t always have to do with how long they have been in AA. A person who's life is going better because of AA, may now and then need something to remind them of that. So a newcomers meeting might show them how bad they were, or in the case of the 'high bottoms,' how bad they could become if they don't remain sober.

On the other hand, a person whose life is not just going better thanks to what they learned in the program, but is going somewhere closer to the promises of happy joyous and free, doesn’t need to see people in trouble to remember. They wouldn't swap this lifestyle even if they were no longer alcoholics.

Some people say in meetings that they are happy they are alcoholics, because it exposed them to this program and a marvelous life, maybe not all are honest in saying that but some are. Also I see some others that have long term sobriety with long faces, and looking like the world is on their shoulders, often the same ones seeking sympathy from others in meetings, oh boo hoo hoo life is so hard, my cat is sick and my dog is queer. We are quick to advise others about the risk of siting on the pity pot, but when people in meetings are doing it we are usually asked to understand and overlook it.

I believe our understanding of a higher power should increase year by year in this program, and the reward is in our increased serenity. Only those who's life has not improved much, I expect would need to remember what it was like before they came in.
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Re: Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

Postby ezdzit247 » Fri Jun 02, 2017 6:17 pm

For me it is not knowledge, but humility that I find at a beginner's meeting.


Same here.

As the sober years roll by, one day at a time, it is much much too easy to forget the nitty gritty details of what it was like and what happened parts that came before what it's like now. Newcomers help me remember that. They remind me how confused, lost, mistrustful, and scared I was and what "pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization" felt like. Plus--and this is a HUGE perk--they give me the opportunity to give back a little of the love, compassion, and caring that I was given in the rooms. Everybody wins!
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Re: Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

Postby Wiganman » Sat Jun 03, 2017 1:32 pm

My aim at any meeting is to carry the message of how I have recovered and am living a peaceful and happy life by following the 12 steps. I am sure that is the main motivating factor for anyone with long-term sobriety attending a Newcomers Meeting.
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Re: Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

Postby Roberth » Mon Jun 05, 2017 8:59 am

The problem with me is that I lose sight of how bad I was.

The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink. Pg 24

Sure I go to new-comer meetings to see if I can help, but even at 25 years I need to be reminded where the demon lives too. My home group is the Skid Row Drifters and Los Angeles' skid row the demon is everywhere.
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Re: Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

Postby avaneesh912 » Mon Jun 05, 2017 9:15 am

The issue i have is treating them as guinea pigs and share that they are here to see their suffering.

But if I am spiritually not fit, i could still go out and get drunk after I come out of a meeting.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: Sharing at Newcomers/Beginners Meetings!

Postby Roberth » Thu Jun 08, 2017 11:57 am

I don’t know about anyone else but whenever I put expectations on people so many times they end up with disappointment followed by resentments. People just don’t do things the way I want them to. I have learned to put the information out there and leave it up to them to use it.

Here are a few things I have learned about new-comers since coming to AA

1 If alcohol hasn’t convinced them to stop drinking, I certainly can’t.

2 It’s not what I say that makes a difference, it what they hear and a lot of times they don’t have the same meaning.

3 I am not keeping them sober and I am not getting them drunk either. I am only showing them the path I took. They sobriety is between them and their God.

4 The most important thing a new-comer will hear is the laughter. The laughter is what turns desperation into hope.
Robert
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in pretty, well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming WOW What a ride!!!!
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