How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

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How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby BeardedOp » Mon Apr 24, 2017 2:15 pm

Having an extremely hard time learning to rely on a power greater than myself for all my problems. Any suggestions? Today I'm 4 months sober but feel like I've lost contact with my higher power.
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby Roberth » Tue Apr 25, 2017 11:41 am

Hello Beardedop, My name is Robert and I am a Los Angeles area alcoholic. Are asking how we came to believe in a higher Power or how we think we are doing God’s will? As for me at 3 months I heard my story coming out of someone else’s mouth and I know AA would work for me, as for relying on a higher power it just doing the next indicated thing. Like the book stated the answers will come if your own house is in order. My understating of a higher Power is always growing. My biggest problem is staying out of the results. Acceptance comes into play there. hope it makes some sense to you
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby avaneesh912 » Tue Apr 25, 2017 12:23 pm

Having an extremely hard time learning to rely on a power greater than myself for all my problems. Any suggestions? Today I'm 4 months sober but feel like I've lost contact with my higher power


Have you already come up with an inventory? And have someone looked at it? have you started making amends? And working 10, 11 diligently?
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby Brock » Tue Apr 25, 2017 2:46 pm

Welcome here BeardedOp, your post took a long time to come up after you sent it in, that won't happen with others you send, it's a guard against the constant spam this site has to deal with.

This question comes up quite often, when newer members get to step 3 and say OK God take over you are in charge, we expect to be able to let go of our will but we can't. Keep in mind it says in 12, having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, then we find it easier to understand. I am a fair number of years sober, and still often get tied up trying to run the show.

The fact that you are interested in contact with your higher power, searching for answers, that's the road the winners take. We have so many you tube spiritual speakers, that we usually can find things that appeal to us. The AA speaker Sandy B has good stuff you can find on you tube, just type in AA and his name, he speaks a good bit on this subject.

It takes a while, and they say we 'trudge' this road a bit, so the going isn't always easy, but when we realize that God is doing things in our lives, the searching and trudging prove to be a small price to pay, best of luck in finding the answers.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby D'oh » Tue Apr 25, 2017 4:14 pm

Hey BeardedOp;

When I got here, I never Lost belief, I had never had a Belief. But the Fellow Members seemed to, and seemed Very Content living life on life's terms.

Good for them, they were definitely a Power Greater than Myself, so I decided to make them a Higher Power that would return me to sanity.

I made a decision to turn My will and Life over to the Fellowship. (what ever that meant???) Basically I drew a line if it ever involved a Tambourine.

I started on my 4th but was struggling. Then I wound up in Detox (just for an upcoming Court Case) Pouting, "Why am I here?" when My Grandma passed. I caught a 2 hour ride back for the Funeral, walked into a home full of Drunks. It was almost too much, but I had time to make the Hometown Meeting that night. Possibly my least favourite Meeting in town.

Sorry for the length.

I made the Meeting with minutes to spare. I left that night with a new meaning of an Open Mind. I went to the Funeral and made it sober. I returned by Motorcycle for the 4 days left of Detox (April and 37 degrees). While there I attended every meeting I could with that Open Mind.

The 3rd meeting, a Smoke filled, dark upstairs room, a member named "Joe" was sitting in a spring less easy chair, knees the same height as his shoulders. He said simple words.

"Everyone's happy faces in this room, isn't because of them. It is a Higher Power working through them." "They are all just messed up Alcoholics"

There was my Proof! Right in front of me. Even the road to get to there was Proof. I just had to Open up and get out of the way, to see it.

Look around BeardedOp, the Proof is all around us.

Good Luck trudging your Road of Happy Destiney
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby Layne » Tue Apr 25, 2017 5:07 pm

Hi BeardedOp.

What makes you think you have lost contact with your higher power?

I know for me, at the times when I feel like I have lost contact with my higher power, I usually discover it is because I am hitting the send button too much. When I am constantly sending, it hinders my ability to receive. If I slow my roll and listen, it turns out that communication never stopped, I was just too preoccupied.
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby Reborn » Tue Apr 25, 2017 10:07 pm

When I feel like that it is not God who moved...its me. What I know to be true today is faith is not belief without proof but trust without reservation. I had a conversation with a sponsee this evening about this very thing. I told him that as soon as you stop trying to put God in a box and learn to just let go and trust in Him life will be a lot easier. When I do this...keep it simple...God reveals himself to me.
We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others. BB pg 132
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby Noels » Tue Apr 25, 2017 11:37 pm

Good morning beautiful people :D Beardedop welcome to e-aa. :D
I have learned so much from the members here since i joined so stick around. There is much wisdom in this group. I have and is still learning from the members each day. Grateful to be part of this group.
Have an awesome day today!
Mwah xxx Noels
There is only Love
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby PaigeB » Wed Apr 26, 2017 1:59 am

The Big Book says I can use a door knob for a Higher Power... But I know I can manipulate a door knob.

The Big Book says I can use the AA Group as a Higher power and that sounded like it would work... I believed AA could help restore me to sanity and I could turn my will and my life over to AA. It was a start because I was willing.

One time a friend of mine asked, "If the AA Group is your HP what do you do after the meeting?" Ut oh... but there it was, an intuitive thought: Every hour of the day, on the hour, somewhere in this world alcoholics are bowing their heads in prayer, perhaps reading How It Works. In Spirit, I am never alone. And AA online proves that to me.

But having faith was rather 2 fold... First, I had to take the action in front of me, despite the Fear. When I trusted that I would not die, that I was not alone... I could see when I got to the other side that I was just fine and my HP had been at work in the world no matter what I said or did. Maybe my mistakes are also part of the Will. So I took the action and I was ok... I had to recognize that and have gratitude that AA was working in my life. When I repeated this "Do & Learn" on small things, I grew a faith that can stand up in the big things too.

We are not asked to have blind faith. We are asked to do the work of this, "practical program of action". For me, I got Faith as a benefit doing that work.

I can't talk myself into a new way of thinking, I have to act my way into a new way of thinking.
another one I like is...
You can't fix a broken tool with a broken tool.

I hope that you can find the Sunlight of the Spirit like I did.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby positrac » Wed Apr 26, 2017 3:29 am

B_Op,
I wanted to throw out a though regarding losing contact. We change and we are transformed into people who don't need to rely on the drink for our answers. Answers to your feeling might be right in front of you and you can't or won't try and see them? I always thought if I saw the burning bush then I was golden and things were looking up...... wrong. But also I had to stop comparing my insides to others outsides when it came to that spiritual glow.

Four months is a good milestone and you have a lot of growing to do and you will learn more will be revealed and it is HP's way of keeping us throttled back. I can't listen when I am high speed low drag and so I have to slow up to see the miracle work.

This too shall pass is all I know about my moment in time.

Have a better day.
You must live your life from beginning to end: No one else can do it for you.
Hopi Proverb
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby Peter.H. » Wed Apr 26, 2017 5:51 am

BeardedOp wrote:Having an extremely hard time learning to rely on a power greater than myself for all my problems. Any suggestions? Today I'm 4 months sober but feel like I've lost contact with my higher power.

Seriously consider the Serenity Prayer and what it means.

Acceptance and gratitude will be the most important words for recovery.
If you are not grateful, then some person, place, thing or situation is not being accepted.
As soon as you accept it, that situation disappears, and the freedom from that creates gratitude.

It takes faith in a Higher Power to face the fears which inhibit the truth behind the non-acceptance.

In short, for me, it is about two things. Face my fears, and loving the Love that loves me.
"...unless this person can experience an entire psyche change there is very little hope of his recovery" - Dr. Silkworth. [Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Ed, p xxix.]
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby BeardedOp » Wed Apr 26, 2017 9:03 am

avaneesh912 wrote: Have you already come up with an inventory? And have someone looked at it? have you started making amends? And working 10, 11 diligently?

I've Just gotten through Step Five with my sponsor. I do not work step 10 as of yet and I'm having trouble remembering to pray and meditate because I've never done such things before.
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby avaneesh912 » Wed Apr 26, 2017 10:33 am

No good alcoholic has done that before. Thats why even after all the work we are asked to do, the book calls us un-disciplined. With the character defects, we start living this way of life. Watching for self-fish, dis-honest, self-seeking motives. Introduce the practice of prayer and mediation like the book suggest. from page 84 till end of "Into action" chapter.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby Brock » Wed Apr 26, 2017 12:54 pm

I do not work step 10 as of yet and I'm having trouble remembering to pray and meditate because I've never done such things before.

Here is a line from step 10 -
Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime.

No not an overnight matter at all. I greatly admire your searching, but try not to worry, these things will fall into place. Some sponsors and folks in meetings talk about 'hit your knees,' but I don't see that in the book. What I see in step 11 is -
We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times.

Relax and take it easy to me is not kneeling down, if some do that good for them, the point is that it's a very personal, no wrong way to do it deal. For me just relaxing one day and realizing I hadn’t thought of drinking for a while, wasn't struggling like I used to be, something had to be giving that to me. Then as I mentioned previously we can start searching for spiritual answers, not a race just sort of think about it in your quiet times. Listen to spiritual music in any form, rock country whatever, if you don't identify try Alan Watts or Joyce Myer or someone else. There are as many spiritual guides on you tube as there are speakers in AA meetings, and the same way I can't identify with every AA speaker, I can't with many spiritual speakers.

Just as it says in the quote from step 11 - “We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind.” Give it time don't struggle, you are on the right road and we are walking it with you.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: How do I learn to rely on a higher power?

Postby Duke » Wed Apr 26, 2017 2:44 pm

Do you get frustrated when people, places and things refuse to align with what you think should happen? Is that one of the reasons you sought release in the bottle?

That's how it was for me. Since I could no longer seek relief in the bottle, it was essential that I find a concept of something greater than me that I could reliably turn all those uncontrollable annoyances over to. In other words, a higher power.

For me, the act of putting the practice of the principles first, including making humble requests for relief and guidance when I didn't know what to do led to a rock solid sense of that something greater.

The trick is, you've got to do it whether you feel like it or not to gain it. It's your decision, my friend. But continuing to practice what you've learned during these times of doubt can be some of the most significant toward finding a faith that works.

Good luck to you.
"If you are humble nothing will touch you, neither praise nor disgrace, because you know what you are.", Mother Teresa
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