I'm a Noob

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I'm a Noob

Postby stavros338 » Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:11 am

Hi there,

I am a 44 yr old school teacher, father of a young autistic son, and type 1 diabetic with about 30 years of regular drinking under my belt. I have tried several times to stop by my own willpower and reason but have never made it past a few weeks. I am at the point now where my addiction to alcohol is endangering my career, marriage, and life (t1 diabetics should NEVER drink the way I do on a pretty regular basis!). I have started listening to an audio version of 'The Big Book', and while I am not ready for a meeting yet, I am wanting to study and pursue this method. Based on what I know of A A, it seems to make good sense to me at this time. I have also fallen far away from any former spiritual life I have attempted to live and feel that this is a good time/way to re-enter it, so to speak.

Any and all suggestions or encouragements are welcome. Thanks for reading!

Steve
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby ezdzit247 » Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:29 am

Hi Steve and welcome.

Glad you found this forum and decided to reach out for help with your drinking problem.

AA has a pamphlet entitled "This is AA - An introduction to the AA recovery program" which will help answer your questions about how the AA program works. You can read it online by clicking on this link:

http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-1_thisisaa1.pdf.

If you want to put the plug in the jug but are having trouble keeping it there and staying sober, here's an excerpt from the pamphlet on AA's 24 hour plan that might be helpful for you:

"For example, we take no pledges, we don’t say that we will “never” drink again. Instead, we try to follow what we in A.A. call the “24-hour plan.” We concentrate on keeping sober just the current twenty-four hours. We simply try to get through one day at a time without a drink. If we feel the urge for a drink, we neither yield nor resist. We merely put off taking that particular drink until tomorrow…."

Keeping coming back....
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children...to leave the world a better place...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby Reborn » Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:31 am

Welcome Steve...Reading the Big Book is a great way to start. This is how I began my journey...I was laid up in a hospital bed for 5 days detoxing and spent alot of that time reading that book. The fact that you realize that your will power is insufficient to keep you from drinking is a great beginning. In order for this thing to work we have to realize we are completely powerless over alcohol...not just when we drink it but the mental twist that leads us back to the first drink no matter how much we don't want to take that drink. Keep reading that book...look for simularities...get to a meeting...listen for someone who knows the book...ask them to take you through the steps. Nothing changes if nothing changes...glad you are here.
We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others. BB pg 132
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby avaneesh912 » Thu Aug 18, 2016 10:54 am

welcome to e-aa. thats a great start. you may also use some of the free workshops online. on youtube you may search for them. there were 2 old guys, together they had over 100 years of sobriety. one was a black dude from arkansas. where he sobered up, he started a sober living place for women. So many of them benefited from his service.

Together they ran workshops, they bring out the message so well. joe and charlie the name. both are gone now but their work still helps lot of people. I get more out of those workshops even today. you may use them too.

good luck with your recovery.
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby PaigeB » Thu Aug 18, 2016 11:38 am

The people of AA are like my "God with skin on it".

I hope you can get to a meeting soon. Hit a lot of them and pick a few that you like. I recently told my youngest sponsee that had she actually done this from the beginning, it would not be so hard to walk into a "strange" meeting on a day when her head is buzzing and her feet feel like lead.

I went to a lot of meetings... checked out a few on every day of the week. I like to think that that practice gave me "smart feet". Feet that will take me to a meeting no matter what my head is saying. :wink:

Welcome. E-aa is a wonderful place to start and I know many who started just the way you have will be along soon to share their journey with you.

Other alcoholics really are the bright spot in my days!
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby Brock » Thu Aug 18, 2016 12:02 pm

Welcome Steve, good advise so far. I would just add a more detailed description of how to find the workshop described by avaneesh, (our site doesn’t generally allow links), at you tube type in “12 Step Big Book Study Joe and Charlie,” it is over ten hours long and can be taken a little at a time, it really explains the book quite well.

Also when it says “the problem is removed, it does not exist for us,” please believe that when some simple steps are done this is absolutely true, as is the promise that we will live “happy joyous and free.” It is a pleasure for us to answer any questions, and best of luck to you.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby stavros338 » Thu Aug 18, 2016 12:03 pm

Thanks, everybody, for the warm welcome, encouragement, and suggestions.
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby whipping post » Thu Aug 18, 2016 1:16 pm

Welcome Steve,

You are the same age I was when I quit. This program works. The guy that took me to my first meeting told me to read the Big Book and get a sponsor to take me through the steps. That was great advice. Hang in there.
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby PuppyEars » Thu Aug 18, 2016 1:23 pm

With step 1 out of the way, our second step is came to believe a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
Hello Steve. Steve please talk to that power that you think is greater than you and ask Him directly if he would restore your sanity by removing the obsession to drink alcohol. If you are atheist or agnostic, I double welcome you!

I look forward to reading the answer(s) you recieve from praying.
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby Troy M. » Fri Aug 19, 2016 4:46 am

Hi Steve and welcome. I lost one teaching job due to my alcoholism, because drinking was more important than being a great teacher and taking care of the details and quit another teaching job before I could get fired for the same reasons. Since I started working the steps and living sober, I am a better teacher, much better husband and father and my life is much better. My spiritual life is so much better now (like you, I had pretty much given up on having a spiritual life at all) and my HP is daily showing me how to be sober, a better husband, father and teacher. I went to quite a few meetings and learned that I couldn't 'think' myself sober. Fortunately, another man reached out to me and we get together every so often to read through the Big Book and work on the 12 steps. Meetings help, but sometimes, they don't, if that makes sense. What I have gotten from meetings is a fellowship of others who have the same problem I have and some new friends who I can call on for advice and help.

I've attended meetings and met former students and parents of former students. I may have parents of current students there as well, but I don't know them all yet. I've met several other teachers and we have the chance to talk about how alcoholism impacts our profession. I had no idea how much support I would find in the rooms of AA.
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby stavros338 » Wed Aug 24, 2016 8:23 am

Thanks, Puppy Ears. I was an Orthodox and Catholic Christian for a few years but kind of lost my faith. I suppose I am a very interested agnostic and I am sometimes a weak theist and other times a weak atheist. I am certainly open to a higher power. I'm not quite sure what that means for me in practical terms, though. :)


PuppyEars wrote:With step 1 out of the way, our second step is came to believe a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
Hello Steve. Steve please talk to that power that you think is greater than you and ask Him directly if he would restore your sanity by removing the obsession to drink alcohol. If you are atheist or agnostic, I double welcome you!

I look forward to reading the answer(s) you recieve from praying.
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby stavros338 » Wed Aug 24, 2016 8:33 am

Thanks for sharing this, Troy. And sorry to hear about your previously lost or abandoned teaching positions. I live in a very small town in a rural area with a tiny school board consisting of five small schools. If I mess up, I'll be blacklisted pretty quickly! Just last week a co-worker probably saw me jump in my Jeep with a can of beer in my hand! DOH! People around here talk. Parents of former students have seen me drunk at local pubs and out and about. It's probably a miracle I still have work here (I'm a good teacher, but am not setting any kind of shining example outside of the classroom these days, I'm embarrassed to admit). This is one of the many reasons I need to ditch the booze. Now.


Troy M. wrote:Hi Steve and welcome. I lost one teaching job due to my alcoholism, because drinking was more important than being a great teacher and taking care of the details and quit another teaching job before I could get fired for the same reasons. Since I started working the steps and living sober, I am a better teacher, much better husband and father and my life is much better. My spiritual life is so much better now (like you, I had pretty much given up on having a spiritual life at all) and my HP is daily showing me how to be sober, a better husband, father and teacher. I went to quite a few meetings and learned that I couldn't 'think' myself sober. Fortunately, another man reached out to me and we get together every so often to read through the Big Book and work on the 12 steps. Meetings help, but sometimes, they don't, if that makes sense. What I have gotten from meetings is a fellowship of others who have the same problem I have and some new friends who I can call on for advice and help.

I've attended meetings and met former students and parents of former students. I may have parents of current students there as well, but I don't know them all yet. I've met several other teachers and we have the chance to talk about how alcoholism impacts our profession. I had no idea how much support I would find in the rooms of AA.
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby avaneesh912 » Wed Aug 24, 2016 9:02 am

I'm not quite sure what that means for me in practical terms, though.


You just have to believe that there is some power greater than yourself that could help you get there. Lot of people get stuck in step 2. All the book says is, you could create your own conception of GOD and move on.

You re-establish the relationship as you clear those character defects that has been blocking you from accessing that channel.

(kind of like a clogged pipe. you are clearing the blockage-dropping the resentments, fear, relationship issues............you become more conscious)
Show him, from your own experience, how the peculiar mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power (Alcoholics Anonymous, Page 92)
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby Larryp713 » Wed Aug 24, 2016 10:44 am

Welcome Steve - I think you have received great advice here. I would like to add that I was about 40 days away from my 44th birthday when I came into the program this last time, really willing to give it a shot. It has been an incredible blessing for me.

As for any spiritual consideration, I would advise not really worrying about that yet. If you're not going to meetings, it might be difficult to really immerse in recovery. I was told to go to at least 90 meetings in 90 days, which seemed impossible as I work full time and have five kids and a wife. But I managed to go to more meetings than that in those first 3 months, and it really set up my recovery and adoption of this new design for living.

I love going to meetings today (definitely did not expect that). I don't get to as often as I like because my family actually likes having me around now. But its in the meetings where I meet newcomers and those struggling with this illness. That gives me immense gratitude when I can share my experience, strength, and hope with others. It motivates me to keep going, and thoughts of drinking have mostly disappeared completely. It doesn't even sound good anymore, and this from a guy who had dropped to the point that I wanted to drink every day and obsessed over it constantly. This program has really given me freedom. I wish you all the best! Larry
Trudging the Road of Happy Destiny!!!
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Re: I'm a Noob

Postby PuppyEars » Wed Aug 24, 2016 11:57 am

Glad you stopped back in, Steve.
It's cool you are at least listening to an audio version of the book, but audio anything for me is open to a lot of distractions. I think it meant a lot to me that I could physically hold the thing I was relating to in the palm of my hands. To go back to a highlighted part that sticks out.
I mention all that because it is important that you become convinced of three ideas. They are

(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought
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