Here I am Again

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Re: Here I am Again

Postby SWIT » Mon Mar 07, 2016 6:19 am

Thank you for sharing your story and your updates. It is a reminder that it can be a struggle even after many years and it does come down to looking at it one day at a time.
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby TBML » Thu Mar 10, 2016 3:58 am

PaigeB wrote:I found I had to be careful that such thoughts stay fleeting! If I harbor them at all (like harboring a thief), if I entertain them (have them over for tea and a cookie while we chat) then I have already crossed a line and need to get together with another AA quickly. Like the bad friend my mother warned me about, alcohol is a leach and will stick itself to me even if I do everything I can to get away from it.

I really needed to replace alcohol with something and I replaced it with the Fellowship of AA.

I also did the Steps and I spend a lot of time everyday thinking about living a principled life and when I will next see my AA people!

Keep coming back - and keep on replacing those thoughts with different, better thoughts!



Some people need constant physical meetings, and some don't. I was one of the lucky ones in a way. I quit drinking after my very first meeting, and stayed sober for over 20 years. I chose to start drinking again and it didn't work out for me, so I chose to stop drinking again. Some people come here ASKING for advice, some don't. There is no one size fits all, and what works for some does not work for others. There is one other thread about know-it-alls driving people away from this board, and I have already witnessed this very thing on other threads. ( I am not singling PaigeB out, and did not find her post offensive)

According to AA, all you need to be a member is a serious desire to stop drinking......has this now changed?
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby Noels » Sat Apr 09, 2016 9:06 am

Hi TBML I'm Noels and enjoyed reading your little chats and updates. Pity they stopped as I'm sure I could have learned some more from them. For instance,
I've been on this site only two months and only learned from this discussion that most of the members I've been communicating with have over 30 years sobriety. Wow. To someone like me that's huge as my mere 7 months have not always been easy yet I'm so exceptionally proud of every 24 hours that makes up that 7 months.
I'm also a person who can handle more than the average person so I understand your irritability in thought that these good people know -it -all. Heck I had that same thought /idea myself at a time.
Thankfully I didn't just do what I did all my life - retreat.
I say thankfully because I now regard myself as part of this group. I enjoy going to my weekly meeting but it is here where I share my experiences, ask my questions and get involved in the conversations. It is here where I learn, agree and disagree and the great thing about it is. .... it's okay.
So since I had the thought /idea that these lovely people were know -it -alls I changed my mind completely and now look at us as a community of individuals who can talk, agree and disagree and sometimes even agree to disagree.
I would not have been able to experience this if I just turned and run.
So I really hope that you will consider staying as I honestly believe we can still learn lots from each other .
Whatever you decide - as a fellow alcoholic I salute you for your turnaround.
Love and light
Noels
There is only Love
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby PaigeB » Sat Apr 09, 2016 11:35 am

TBML wrote:According to AA, all you need to be a member is a serious desire to stop drinking......has this now changed?

You are right. One need not be serious at all! I just responded on another thread that even a "sincere" desire is not required.
Personally I will never question a member's alcoholic status due to my experience mentioned. Apart from that I feel it's downright rude and a no no.


Ditto. That is the way I was taught. We cannot pronounce anyone else an alcoholic but ourselves.

If they get some sort of "wrong" message and go drink
or
They are ousted and go drink

What's the difference?

My understanding of my HP is that I am Powerless over results, HP is in charge of that. The rest is just Ego thinking I am right.
Tradition Four: Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or AA as a whole.

1. Do I insist that there are only a few right ways of doing things in AA?

My group admits all who think they have a desire to stop drinking. History shows that the word "sincere" was removed from the Tradition... hence it is not even a "sincere desire to stop". No judgments. Good. Here at e-aa we also admit all who have a desire to stop drinking. There are no tests for the "real" in the level of their desire.
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby TBML » Thu Jul 28, 2016 9:15 am

Thanks Noels,

I actually came back to look for this thread so I could figure out how long I have not been drinking. When I quit the first time 20 some years ago, I knew the day, date and time. I had little mental anniversaries where I congratulated myself for making another month, another year etc. Now I don't feel the need to do that.

My point is what works for you, may or may not work for other people. I may have come across as snippy, but I write what I feel. I haven't been to a meeting or talked to another person about my alcohol addiction in months, but I still thank my HP every night for helping to give ME the strength to have made it through another day.

I'm beginning to feel that I have really begun to have put this behind me again after 6 months or so. I have moved most of my focus onto other areas of personal development, excersizing, losing weight, eating healthy, being nicer to people, doing things for others etc.


I am a much better person w/o Alcohol.
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby TBML » Sun Nov 13, 2016 5:59 am

Well, another few months have gone by, and I am taking back my life!

Thoughts of drinking have become almost non-existent, and when they do come it's after some trigger like riding by a bar I used to go to or a friend's house where I used to drink....no serious contemplation of actually doing it though!

I have lost 65 lbs in the last 3 months and I feel great. I have been full of energy , and have redone my sunken living room, installed a new coal stove, cleaned and organized my garage and laid new laminate floors.

As Rotal Snart said on the title track of his soon to be maybe upcoming album "Mountain City"....even though I'm 51, I feel my life has just begun....

Now it's time for some Surf Fishing!

Good luck to all those trying to change your lives, you can do it if you want to!
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby Brock » Sun Nov 13, 2016 6:39 am

Well done, messages like that truly show the power of the program, and are helpful particularly to new comers.
"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby clouds » Sun Nov 13, 2016 6:43 am

Congratulations on three months of freedom from alcohol! :D

We're always here to listen and share our experience with the 12 steps we took as a program of recovery.
" Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house." page 98 A.A.
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby TBML » Thu Dec 15, 2016 3:38 pm

Thanks 'Brock' and 'Clouds' and everyone else here who is trying to change for the better. It's hard, but well worth it. As I said before, now that I am no longer a drinker, I have time, money, and the will to make myself a better person. I took a month off from my weight loss program because I was starting to feel a little tired and run down, I had been running and jogging a lot, and low carb was not cutting it, but I still lost 2 pounds. I just went back on low carb and I have now lost 75 lbs. total. I am looking and and am feeling great. 25 lbs more to go.

Losing weight and stopping drinking are both difficult, but if you really want to do it, you can. You can do anything you put your mind to within reason....I used this forum as a crutch when I decided to stop before the madness stopped me, and I thank you all for your help and support. Good things in life require you to put in an honest effort, you just must decide whether or not YOU are worth it!
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby Lali » Sat Dec 17, 2016 6:53 am

I'm so glad that you are doing well. Thanks for letting us know!
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Re: Here I am Again

Postby TBML » Sat Dec 17, 2016 7:42 pm

Lali wrote:I'm so glad that you are doing well. Thanks for letting us know!



Thank You, Lali. I do like to check back in here now and then, it's kind of like my meeting, posting some and reading the posts of others. I did all the steps 20 some years ago. I did not feel it would be productive to do them all over again, some would open up old wounds. I'm just thankful I caught myself before things progressed too far. It's easy to fall back to your old ways. I know I'll never conquer alcohol, it is stronger than me.
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