Journey back to sobriety

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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby Tosh » Sun Dec 27, 2015 4:42 pm

GreatD wrote:Wife not making it easy, jumps all down my throat about something not alcohol related then throws the drinking card in my face. I defend myself and well, we didn't like that too much. Not making life very enjoyable today


Dogs bark, GreatD and our partners get angry and throw our drinking into our faces. It's what they do sometimes.

But stay sober for long enough and you'll be able to say, "Look, I've been sober for 'X amount of time'; it's getting a bit boring you bringing up the past all the time!"

It quietens them down a bit.

And I go through these phases where I'm meditating for an hour-a-day, everyday, and if I ever get tetchy or bad-tempered she's like in a patronising voice, "The meditation's not working, Tosh, it's not working...", and I want to strangle her.

She's also read the steps and she focussed on the part in Step 10 where it says 'and when we were wrong promptly admitted it', and during a heated argument she once yelled at me to "10th Step that now!!!" I S*** you not!

I try to look upon Mrs Tosh as a teacher of patience and tolerance; those of us who live with difficult partners grow more spiritually than those who live alone or have easy going partners.

That's true that is. :lol:

Happy trudging and don't drink, mate.

PS. "pause, when agitated' (page 87, Big Book); it's the relationship saver. Top tip there.
Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again, come, come.” Rumi (No sniggering from the sex addicts)
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby GreatD » Mon Dec 28, 2015 4:48 pm

Thank you Tosh, you and everyone here have been a big help
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby Tosh » Mon Dec 28, 2015 7:02 pm

GreatD wrote:Thank you Tosh, you and everyone here have been a big help


Families aren't easy.

Last week I drove two hours to collect my teenage step daughter - and all her gear (tv/xbox/computer/bags of clothes/boxes) - from university, to bring her home for Christmas. While at home I've taxied her around to see her friends and back from the pub after she's been drinking.

Today, I did the reverse journey; loaded the car with all her gear and drove her the two hours back. All that morning she had a face on her like a 'Lurgan spade' (an unhappy stroppy looking face); I'm not sure what's going on with her, when asked she just claimed she was tired.

I dropped her off and carted all her gear up three-flights-of-stairs.

I think she expected me to give her more 'partying money', but I didn't; she's had more than enough to squander. When I left, she didn't even thank me.

Dog's bark and teenage daughters are moody, stroppy, and full of self. This is reality; it's pointless me fighting against it; I may as well push-up against the universe, so I did the 'pause, when agitated' thing instead.

Some might make it look easy, but a lot of my recovery has been done through gritted teeth. :lol:

Hopefully I'll get a spurt of spiritual growth at some stage.
Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again, come, come.” Rumi (No sniggering from the sex addicts)
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby GreatD » Thu Dec 31, 2015 8:58 am

Happy New Year...

Here's to the most sober one in 18 years
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby Chelle » Thu Dec 31, 2015 9:41 am

Back at ya Great D. I had my first sober in a long time last year. My almost last drink was Dec.30 2014 so I was drying out and it was quite the miserable one. :evil: I went back out in March because I apparently hadn't had enough, and landed in AA in April. What a diffferce a year makes. Keep doing what your doing :D
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby Robert R » Thu Dec 31, 2015 10:03 am

Hi GreatD, Enjoy waking up in 2016 with a clear head. :D :D :D
Don't know exactly where I am going but I'm on my way and it's already much better than where I've been.
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby clouds » Thu Dec 31, 2015 11:23 am

Robert R wrote:Hi GreatD, Enjoy waking up in 2016 with a clear head. :D :D :D


:D

Happy New Year all of yous!

I sometimes have the insight to see how great teachers can be athe most annoying ones.



Still trudging with the occasional jump for joy.
" Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house." page 98 A.A.
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby GreatD » Tue Jan 12, 2016 11:26 am

One month in the books...wasn't easy...not all fun...but it was sober
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby Tosh » Tue Jan 12, 2016 12:06 pm

GreatD wrote:One month in the books...wasn't easy...not all fun...but it was sober


Well done, Great D; one month's great.
Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again, come, come.” Rumi (No sniggering from the sex addicts)
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby tyg » Tue Jan 12, 2016 2:06 pm

GreatD wrote:One month in the books...wasn't easy...not all fun...but it was sober


It is a pretty cool deal that we can permanent sobriety and happy contented useful lives. It gets better and the struggles become less. Alcohol was never my problem, a broken spirit was. Once that is fixed, I have a whole new attitude and my reactions to life change. Have you tried some of AA''s activities, gone to their potlucks, round up etc? Check out your local AA Intergoup office, there website will list events going on or call them to inquire. We are not a glum lot. Life gets good without wanting, needing or missing alcohol, no matter our circumstances. Of course that only came true for me by appling these spiritual principles and followed what's outlined in the 164 pages of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Happy dance time in celebration of your month... Woot Woot!!!
~The secret to the AA program is the first three words on page 112~
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby PaigeB » Wed Jan 13, 2016 1:05 am

Good good good! You must be doing something right! I remember when I could not give you 30 minutes let alone 30 days! AND You don't have to do the first 30 days again! Get yourself in the middle of AA and do what they do and you'll continue to string together more days and more positive experiences to share with the next new guy - the one who cannot imagine the next 30 minutes! He doesn't care much about 5 years, he wants to be ok in the next 5 minutes ~ YOU know how to do that!

Keep coming back!
If I'm not able to say how I'm working my program today, then I'm not working my program.
The e-AA Group's 7th Tradition link: www.e-aa.org/group_seventh.php
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby 13ickensd » Wed Jan 13, 2016 1:44 am

I am 100% new to joining but old enough to know better. One of my best friends gave me the book few years ago. Me trying is like fighting against quicksand. And I am still in the thick of it. Any words? Please
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urney back to sobriety

Postby 13ickensd » Wed Jan 13, 2016 1:46 am

Tosh wrote:
GreatD wrote:Wife not making it easy, jumps all down my throat about something not alcohol related then throws the drinking card in my face. I defend myself and well, we didn't like that too much. Not making life very enjoyable today


Dogs bark, GreatD and our partners get angry and throw our drinking into our faces. It's what they do sometimes.

But stay sober for long enough and you'll be able to say, "Look, I've been sober for 'X amount of time'; it's getting a bit boring you bringing up the past all the time!"

It quietens them down a bit.

And I go through these phases where I'm meditating for an hour-a-day, everyday, and if I ever get tetchy or bad-tempered she's like in a patronising voice, "The meditation's not working, Tosh, it's not working...", and I want to strangle her.

She's also read the steps and she focussed on the part in Step 10 where it says 'and when we were wrong promptly admitted it', and during a heated argument she once yelled at me to "10th Step that now!!!" I S*** you not!

I try to look upon Mrs Tosh as a teacher of patience and tolerance; those of us who live with difficult partners grow more spiritually than those who live alone or have easy going partners.

That's true that is. :lol:

Happy trudging and don't drink, mate.

PS. "pause, when agitated' (page 87, Big Book); it's the relationship saver. Top tip there.
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby 13ickensd » Wed Jan 13, 2016 1:49 am

Tosh,
She is trying, but you have to realize you have succumbed to your own thoughts. This is not her it is you, you can be exactly what you want, it's your choice
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Re: Journey back to sobriety

Postby 13ickensd » Wed Jan 13, 2016 1:50 am

Hey
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