Search found 12 matches

by nickyj
Wed May 09, 2012 3:24 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: The relapse that wasn't
Replies: 13
Views: 2181

Re: The relapse that wasn't

I have heard so many stories of "non" alcoholic drinks eventually leading someone to a relapse. IMO it is not necessarily the drinks themselves but the mindset of the person drinking them which lends itself to not being successful at staying sober.
by nickyj
Wed May 09, 2012 3:18 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Where does the 90 days come from?
Replies: 36
Views: 25458

Re: Where does the 90 days come from?

My understanding is that the 90 days comes from the justice sytem in the US where people were/are sentenced to attend 90 meetings in 90 days.
by nickyj
Fri Mar 30, 2012 2:13 pm
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: Lost Newcomer
Replies: 15
Views: 2151

Re: Lost Newcomer

Everything has pretty much been covered but I just wanted to say hi and keep going. Things will work out with time if you follow the suggestions you are given. I would echo the idea about getting to meetings early and helping to set up and staying around afterwards to help with the clearing up. That...
by nickyj
Wed Mar 28, 2012 11:51 am
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: For the Newcomer...
Replies: 6
Views: 1130

Re: For the Newcomer...

Thanks for this post. I think it will be really helpful to print out and refer to when working with newcomers. Something that was a big deal for me was being told that asking for help is only half the story. I have to be willing to listen and accept the help and willing to follow suggestion as well....
by nickyj
Sat Mar 10, 2012 2:08 pm
Forum: Sponsorship
Topic: Dry for 10 years without program
Replies: 25
Views: 9413

Re: Dry for 10 years without program

Defintely always good to check motives. I find with a lot of recovery questions like the one on this thread there is no right or wrong answer its all about experience. Easier to avoid smugness of self righteousness when I accept that there is nothing to be right about and absolutely no reason to thi...
by nickyj
Thu Mar 08, 2012 11:54 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: How can I help my mother?
Replies: 7
Views: 1167

Re: How can I help my mother?

I'm going to try and be more active in her recovery. The important thing is that she takes ownership of her recovery. If you and your aunt are working harder and being more active than she is then it is never going to work. I hope she gets something out of rehab and gets a renewed introduction to t...
by nickyj
Thu Mar 08, 2012 11:24 am
Forum: Sponsorship
Topic: Dry for 10 years without program
Replies: 25
Views: 9413

Re: Dry for 10 years without program

You seem to imply that I have some sort of negative motive for wanting to know. I dont understand why. Your post has confused me somewhat. I have no ulterior motive. It is as I said that it would be interesting to know and there may well be things to be learned from the experience and how it worked ...
by nickyj
Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:08 am
Forum: Sponsorship
Topic: Dry for 10 years without program
Replies: 25
Views: 9413

Re: Dry for 10 years without program

Just seen the original post date for this thread - 2010!! - would be really interesting to know how the situation progressed and what the outcome was?
by nickyj
Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:05 am
Forum: Sponsorship
Topic: Dry for 10 years without program
Replies: 25
Views: 9413

Re: Dry for 10 years without program

Its a difficult one and I'm not sure I have any answer but a few thoughts spring to mind. Firstly I think I would be asking how he thinks he has been staying sober all this time and more detail about exactly why he wants to do the steps now. I am not sure it would change the course of action but the...
by nickyj
Wed Mar 07, 2012 9:44 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Triggers
Replies: 20
Views: 2422

Re: Triggers

I dont believe in "triggers" as they refer to something that triggers us to drink. It goes against my whole belief about what alcoholism is - a belief that I got from reviewing my experience in light of what it says in the drs opinion and the first three chapters of the big book. And thats a good th...
by nickyj
Wed Mar 07, 2012 9:35 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: What is your Higher Power?
Replies: 34
Views: 11118

Re: What is your Higher Power?

I got really bogged down around steps 2 and 3 in trying to establish what my higher power was or wasnt and get some sort of connection with it. I thought I had to have all that tied down before I could move on. I have since understood that we have a spiritual awakening as the result of doing the ste...
by nickyj
Wed Mar 07, 2012 9:07 pm
Forum: The 12 Steps
Topic: The Steps Aren't Necessary
Replies: 82
Views: 46940

Re: The Steps Aren't Necessary

I remember when I was first told that not everyone in AA was an alcoholic. I was amazed. I couldnt understand why anyone would want to go to AA if it wasnt 100% necessary. I have since learnt that there are lots of reasons people go not always to do with being powerless over alcohol. The word alcoho...