Search found 15 matches

by Splicer_777
Sat Feb 23, 2019 3:34 pm
Forum: For the Newcomer
Topic: Crawling all the way back
Replies: 5
Views: 1452

Crawling all the way back

It's been 5 years since I first discovered AA and I've never been sober more than 5 months. Recently I had the most monstrous relapse and blew up my life completely, driving all over the country and running up massive charges on credit cards. I did this with the full intent to commit suicide soon, s...
by Splicer_777
Wed Feb 13, 2019 7:50 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: “Take what you need, and leave the rest”
Replies: 14
Views: 2854

Re: “Take what you need, and leave the rest”

I take it that you are suggesting: absolute conformity to an antiquated AA program, or else perish in your disease? I am definitely going through the latter right now. The bottom fell out, and I am embracing financial debt and complete irresponsibility as a precursor to suicide. The thought of enter...
by Splicer_777
Mon Oct 15, 2018 5:17 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

What is with this assumption that I might have a "spouse" or "children"? LoL.... CHILDREN? Those things are unheard of for me. I haven't even dated a single person in more than a decade. I've had severe trouble doing any kind of socializing my entire life. That is why the "fellowship" aspect of AA i...
by Splicer_777
Sun Oct 14, 2018 4:19 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

Just went to an AA meeting and walked out after 10 minutes. People's 'success' stories are totally unrelatable and I get EXTREMELY bored. I am reaching new levels of depression of loneliness like I've never had before. I am so depressed it is hard to breathe. I am rapidly wasting all my savings beca...
by Splicer_777
Tue Oct 09, 2018 7:03 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

I'm gonna commit suicide Alcohol is a symptom. It doesn't matter if I stay sober for a while. All it does is bring my core problems to do forefront and exposes it in clear fluorescent light. That is what sobriety feels like. I have deep-rooted psychological damage caused by too much isolation, inter...
by Splicer_777
Tue Sep 04, 2018 3:59 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

I do appreciate that y'all aren't getting on my case or condemning me for having a pity-party on here. And I understand why. This disease is so deadly, just think of all the people in the rooms that get some years together get some chips, then they go out and die. Yelling at a newcomer alcoholic for...
by Splicer_777
Tue Sep 04, 2018 11:44 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

Wow the drinking is really taking control... I feel myself succumbing to it, I'll probably commit suicide in 2-3 months when I run out of money. I just can't stop engaging in reckless behavior on a constant basis because it's like, I have to run away from my mind
by Splicer_777
Mon Sep 03, 2018 8:12 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

I haven't been able to sit through an entire AA meeting lately. It's 15 minutes have elapsed and I walk right out. Why can't we have a meeting without reading how it works, the 12 steps and 12 traditions every time? Why can't we have a meeting without holding hands with a bunch of strangers and sayi...
by Splicer_777
Fri Aug 24, 2018 4:20 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

OK I got drunk again last night, exercised all day, and started really late. Drank an entire bottle of dessert wine which isn't much at all by my standards. Made sure to eat a really nutritious salad afterwards and woke up feeling OK with no hangover. You see, I know that it's all an illusion of con...
by Splicer_777
Tue Aug 21, 2018 5:06 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

OK so I went back to that meeting and it was a lot better. I got over my resentments. There's this pattern where if I spend too much time alone, and it's like a timebomb and my thoughts become morbid and self-devouring and its a scary-good, seductive feeling and I never see it coming. I guess you co...
by Splicer_777
Sun Aug 19, 2018 3:14 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

^^^Example of a parrot

By the way I went into detail with exactly what I said if you scroll down.
by Splicer_777
Sun Aug 19, 2018 12:30 pm
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

That alludes to what I shared in that particular meeting. Basically I told them that I've been going to AA for 5 years and relapsed over and over again, staying sober for a few months at a time. I have had many sponsors and I have 4 notebooks full of 4th step work. Since I honestly get bored in meet...
by Splicer_777
Sun Aug 19, 2018 9:19 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Re: Condescension in AA

When I said CERTAINLY UNIQUE no one picked up on the subtle sarcasm? Anyways, I get really irritated when I speak my mind at a meeting -- which is what you're supposed to do, be honest -- and people jump down my throat saying: "NO, what you said is WRONG, listen to ME because what I'M telling you is...
by Splicer_777
Sun Aug 19, 2018 4:36 am
Forum: Discussions
Topic: Condescension in AA
Replies: 59
Views: 15488

Condescension in AA

Last night I spoke my mind at an AA meeting and everyone started crosstalking at me and repeating trite phrases like "get a sponsor and work the steps" and "blah blah blah I've been through this before, I didn't get it just like you son, I had to beaten down blah blah blah but then I turrrrned my wi...
by Splicer_777
Sun Dec 31, 2017 2:09 pm
Forum: Young People in AA (YPAA)
Topic: YPAA is not supportive, its not really AA
Replies: 7
Views: 6598

YPAA is not supportive, its not really AA

...and it can be anathema to sobriety. I am speaking simply from my experience. Over the past 4 years I've had several relapses and they have been spurred by complete alienation from YPAA meetings and events. Nothing kills faith than going to a place where you're supposed to find support, only to fi...