e-AA Chat Format

Get Help Now
Email & Chat Meetings, Discussion Forums AA Meetings Around the World Basic Info & Readings on Alcoholics Anonymous AA Grapevine, Our Meeting in Print e-AA Group Info, Personal Stories, and More

Today's Meetings | Full Schedule | Chat FAQs | How to Copy & Paste  

Thursday Beginners' Big Book Study Meeting

Jan 12

Link to reading:   http://www.e-aa.org/chat/eaa_chat_reading.php?ID=42  


When a newcomer is present, Link to Step-1 Reading: click here


Taken from the 4th edition of the book Alcoholics Anonymous, copyrighted by AA World Services Inc. and used with permission.

Chapter 1 -- BILL'S STORY

pages 6 - 7

Raise your hand " !! " at anytime if you would like to share.


As the whisky rose to my head I told myself I would manage better next time, but I might as well get good and drunk then. And I did.

The remorse, horror and hopelessness of the next morning are unforgettable. The courage to do battle was not there. My brain raced uncontrollably and there was a terrible sense of impending calamity. 

I hardly dared cross the street, lest I collapse and be run down by an early morning truck, for it was scarcely daylight. An all night place supplied me with a dozen glasses of ale. My writhing nerves were stilled at last. A morning paper told me the market had gone to hell again. Well, so had I.  

The market would recover, but I wouldn't. That was a hard thought. Should I kill myself? No - not now. Then a mental fog settled down. Gin would fix that. So two bottles, and - oblivion.

The mind and body are marvelous mechanisms, for mine endured this agony two more years. Sometimes I stole from my wife's slender purse when the morning terror and madness were on me. Again I swayed dizzily before an open window, or the medicine cabinet where there was poison, cursing myself for a weakling.  

There were flights from city to country and back, as my wife and I sought escape. Then came the night when the physical and mental torture was so hellish I feared I would burst through my window, sash and all. Somehow I managed to drag my mattress to a lower floor, lest I suddenly leap. A doctor came with a heavy sedative.  

Next day found me drinking both gin and sedative. This combination soon landed me on the rocks. People feared for my sanity. So did I. I could eat little or nothing when drinking, and I was forty pounds under weight.

My brother-in-law is a physician, and through his kindness and that of my mother I was placed in a nationally-known hospital for the mental and physical rehabilitation of alcoholics. Under the so-called belladonna treatment my brain cleared. Hydrotherapy and mild exercise helped much. Best of all, I met a kind doctor who explained that though certainly selfish and foolish, I had been seriously ill, bodily and mentally.


END of Reading

update by TM for Jan 12

Get Help Now  |  Email & Chat Meetings, Discussion Forums  |  AA Meetings Worldwide
About Alcoholics Anonymous  |  The AA Grapevine, Our Meeting in Print
Group Information, Personal Stories, and More
Alcoholics Anonymous, A.A., The Big Book, and Box 4-5-9 are registered trademarks or service marks of A.A. World Services, Inc.
The Grapevine, A.A. Grapevine, GV, and Box 1980 are registered trademarks or service marks of The A.A. Grapevine, Inc.